Need help finding wimmin

Discussion in 'MCSE' started by Network Guru, Jul 1, 2005.

  1. Network Guru

    Network Guru Guest

    Some of you know of my dilemma in my quest for attracting a partner of the
    opposite sex. In fact, I've been corresponding in private with some of you
    and receiving sound advice for my online dating profile. In a nutshell, I
    am in my late 30's and have been meeting the following types of women:

    1) The clock ticking lone-wolf 'career' chick: Usually in her mid to late
    30's, sometimes 40+. This person is usually established in their 'career'
    and hears her biological clock ticking so she begins a frantic search for
    Mr. Right. Many of them are desperate to get their hands on children.
    Problem is, I do not desire children....when they indicate they have
    aspirations to start a family, I not only RUN, but RUN FAR and RUN FAR FAST!
    I'll let some other chivalrous male father her children and write the child
    support checks out for the next 20 years when she files for divorce.

    2) The lone wolf 'career' chick who's clock has exploded and can not
    reproduce. By the time this occurs, they are old and washed up. The ones
    who had beauty power in their younger years, STILL think they are desirable
    and are too self-absorbed to realize mother nature has punished them for
    ageing. I get a laugh when they say "I look young for my age". I've
    attempted to pursue a few of these and have been rejected by most...well
    actually all. Talk about a blow to your ego. This type usually has bought
    into the feminist way of thinking and chased a 'career' and by the time they
    came up for air, their reproductive years were behind them. They also tend
    to be independent and have the financial wherewithal to live a reasonably
    good life without a man. By the time their clock explodes, they are too set
    in their ways to make a marriage work and usually have no interest in

    3). women with children... For me, assuming responsibility for another mans
    offspring is not an attractive proposition. Others are comfortable with
    this role, but I am not.

    4) Prozac chick... They fall into one of the categories above with the
    addition of being mentally unstable and medicated. Why do they tell me this
    stuff over the phone even before I meet them. jeeeeeezzzzz. On the
    upside, they tend to not have any inhibitions in bed.

    I think the biggest problem for me is many of the women my age are very well
    educated and have achieved financial freedom by eschewing having a family
    and chasing the feminist dream by pursuing a 'career'. If they achieve a
    certain level of success, they want a male even more successful, problem
    for them is that the man they want is already taken or he is banging the
    young 20 something...he isn't interested in a menopausing ocelot. Being
    that mr right is not available to them, they refuse to lower their standard
    and take me.... I hope they are happy being alone with their cats.

    So guys, what are my do I go about finding mrs right
    Network Guru, Jul 1, 2005
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  2. Network Guru

    Zed Guest

    "classic sociopath" , Your Honour.

    Zed, Jul 1, 2005
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  3. Network Guru

    Briscobar Guest

    NG, may I offer up another class of women you seem to have forgotten?

    The Rebound Chick: These women come in many shapes, sizes, and ages. Also,
    they have varying levels of financial and mental stability. This is truly a
    cross-section of society. And society has dregs, for sure. However, should
    you be able to find one of these women, you will be in for an easy time. The
    Rebound Chick is open to suggestion, and the power of suggestion should not
    be underrated. The Rebound Chick is giving, caring, nurturing, and overtly
    sexual. This is due to the fact that they don't want to lose another man,
    like they did last month when Steve came home one night with another woman,
    told The Rebound Chick to get out and that she wasn't good enough for him.

    The Rebound Chick may or may not have children, and sometimes it is
    impossible to tell just by looking at them. Further study may be required.

    The best way to find The Rebound Chick is to take a day off from work, head
    over to a cafe or even the mall, and find a group of women. The one being
    paid the most attention is The Rebound Chick. You see, she's so depressed
    that she needs to take time off of work to spend with "the girls", and they
    do what women do best - shop and talk. "The Girls" comfort The Rebound
    Chick, so the one being fawned over is definitely her.

    Good luck in your quest, NG.


    MCNGP #26
    When a girl walks in with a itty bitty waist and a round thing in your
    face, you get
    Briscobar, Jul 1, 2005
  4. Network Guru

    Guest Guest

    You're forgetting the greatest chick magnet of all....get your coveted MCSE
    and get that lapel pin on where the wimmin can see it. You won't have any
    more problems...unless of course you get an IT job and have to PROVE you know
    your stuff!!!
    Guest, Jul 1, 2005
  5. Network Guru

    Network Guru Guest

    Good advice mr B! I'm off today and will be heading to the coffee house
    ISO of the rebound chick.
    Network Guru, Jul 1, 2005
  6. Network Guru

    Frisbee® Guest

    To add to Ken's comments, why aren't you looking for younger wimmin?

    College-age girls would be in awe of the fact that you already have your
    degree and have been a working professional for a while. They're too young
    to be worrying about their biological clock yet.

    Also, there are some plusses to hitching up with single moms. Their ex is
    paying the child support, so that's extra income. You'll also miss the
    diaper/potty training years, and get the kids as tax deductions.

    Note to googling wife: Don't take everything I post seriously.
    Frisbee®, Jul 1, 2005
  7. Network Guru

    CBIC Guest

    NG forget about dating and just frequent prostitutes. No hassles, just give
    them some money, shoot your wad, kick them out of the car, go get a beer,
    take a nap. To me that sounds like a perfect "date."
    CBIC, Jul 1, 2005
  8. Network Guru

    CBIC Guest

    Plus college girls are more bendy in the sack.
    Note to googling wife: Please try to be more bendy in the sack.
    CBIC, Jul 1, 2005
  9. Network Guru

    Briscobar Guest

    Please see yesterday's threads about "standards."
    Briscobar, Jul 1, 2005
  10. Network Guru

    kpg Guest

    Your problem can be summed up in one word:

    American Women.

    But there is hope. As many companies have discovered,
    the advantages of going offshore are tremendous.

    You'll want to target impoverished nations, but avoid
    those with civil strife. A good starting place would
    be the Philippines or South Korea.

    Consider this: to third world inhabitants you appear as
    wealthy as Bill Gates, even if you only make minimum
    wage. Let's face it, $6.25 an hour goes a long way in
    a country where the average annual income is $700 a

    Of course the hard conditions in third world countries
    age the women fast, so you'll want to go young. But hey!,
    that's Ok. It's not unusual for these women to marry at
    the age of thirteen.

    Aside from the obvious advantages of such a young bride
    you can train them to be any kind of woman you want.
    Just don't spoil them or expose them to too much Western
    culture too fast. It's probably a good idea not to teach
    them English.

    But before you bring home a wife I would spend some time
    shopping around. There are plenty of cultures with lots
    of young, beautiful, naïve women, so don't be in a big
    rush to marry one. Take your time and enjoy.


    "The opinions expressed in this post are not necessarily
    those of the author, this newsgroup, Microsoft, Bill Gates,
    Norman Rockwell, or any other fictional character."
    kpg, Jul 1, 2005
  11. Network Guru

    catwalker63 Guest

    The googling wives and I are going shopping . . .

    at Chipendales!

    aka Pu$$y Feet
    MCNGP #43
    "If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but it would
    deteriorate the cat." Mark Twain
    catwalker63, Jul 1, 2005
  12. Network Guru

    CBIC Guest

    Please be to helping my wife pick out something s3xy for the bedroom. I am
    to be thanking you muchly.
    CBIC, Jul 1, 2005
  13. Network Guru

    Guest Guest

    Word of advice from a female in her late 20's. Worry about yourself, and
    your career. Chicks like guys who are secure. It makes for a better

    You sound almost desparate to get one. You need to stop looking for chicks,
    it seems you have a problem attracting the messed up ones
    Would you want to have a "sugar momma", that's doing WAY better than you?

    It happens to ALLLL WOMEN eventually, get over it!
    Chicks like that have a self esteem issue, you may have to take what you can
    get on that one
    The question you need to ask yourself is are you out for a piece of @$$ or
    are you out for a GF who could be a wife.
    Guest, Jul 6, 2005
  14. Network Guru

    Briscobar Guest

    Briscobar, Jul 6, 2005
  15. Network Guru

    JaR Guest

    In microsoft.public.cert.exam.mcse, Briscobar spewed across the ether:
    JaR, Jul 6, 2005
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