I Need an MCSE Boy

Discussion in 'MCSE' started by Stacy Brown, Aug 26, 2004.

  1. Stacy Brown

    Neil Guest

    or deeply disturbing childrens stories...
     
    Neil, Sep 3, 2004
    #61
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  2. Stacy Brown

    Jtyc Guest

    I was young once. I prefer Nora Roberts now. Lasts longer. <eg>

    Daniel Steel is the shiznit.
     
    Jtyc, Sep 3, 2004
    #62
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  3. Stacy Brown

    JaR Guest

    In microsoft.public.cert.exam.mcse, Neil climbed on a soapbox & opined:
    $.50 to Julie Brown;

    Because I'm a blonde I don't have to think, I talk like a baby and I
    never pay for drinks
    Don't have to worry if I'm getting a man if I keep this blonde and I keep
    these tan
    Cause I'm a blonde yeah, yeah, yeah
    Cause I'm a blonde yeah yeah yeah
    I see people working and it just makes me giggle, cause I don't have to
    work, I just have to giggle
    Cause I'm a blonde B-L-O-N-D
    Cause I'm a blond don't you wish you were me?
    I never learned to read and I never learned to cook
    Why should I bother when I look like I look?
    I know lots of people are smarter than me, but I have this philosophy,
    "So what?"
    Cause I'm a blonde yeah yeah yeah
    I see girls without dates and I feel so sorry for them cause whenever I'm
    around, all the men ignore 'em
    Cause I'm a blonde nyah nyah nyah
    Cause I'm a blonde nyah nyah nyah
    They say to make it you need talent and ambition, well I got a tv show,
    and this is my audition;
    Umm. . . okay. . . what was it?. . . ummm don't tell me. . . oh, yeah,
    okay "Duck Magnum, duck!"
    Cause I'm a blonde yeah yeah yeah
    Cause I'm a blonde yeah yeah yeah
    I took an IQ test and I flunked it of course, I can't spell BMW but I got
    a Porsche
    Cause I'm a blonde B-L-I-N-D
    Cause I'm a blonde don't you wish you were me?
    I just want to say that being chosen as this month's Miss August is like
    a compliment I'll remember for as long as I can.
    Right now I'm a freshman in my fourth year at UCLA but my goal is to
    become a veterinarian cause I love children
    Cause I'm a blonde yeah yeah yeah
    Cause I'm a blonde yeah yeah yeah
    Girls think I'm snotty and maybe its true
    With my hair and body, you would be too
    Cause I'm a blonde B-L- . . . I don't know!
    Cause I'm a blonde yeah yeah yeah
    Cause I'm a blonde yeah yeah yeah!
     
    JaR, Sep 3, 2004
    #63
  4. Stacy Brown

    Jtyc Guest

    Oh my god! The prom queen has a gun!
     
    Jtyc, Sep 3, 2004
    #64
  5. Stacy Brown

    Neil Guest

    true story - I watched a blonde at a former office take a bottle of "1-a-
    day" brand vitimins she had just purchased over lunch hour, turn the
    bottle on the side to read the directions and mutter aloud in my presence
    "I wonder how often you take these"...all I could do was laugh. I think
    she's a natural blonde, don't you...
     
    Neil, Sep 3, 2004
    #65
  6. Stacy Brown

    Consultant Guest

    hoooooo) It was homecoming night at my high school
    (hoooooo) Everyone was there, it was totally cool
    (hoooooo) I was real excited, I almost wet my jeans
    (hoooooo) ÔCause my best friend Debbie was homecoming queen
    (hoo, wah, hoo, wah) She looked so pretty in pink chiffon (chiffon)
    Riding the float with her tierra on (tierra on)
    Holding this humongous bouquet in her hand (bouquet)
    She looked straight out of Disneyland
    You know the Cinderella ride, I mean definitely an E ticket (E ticket)
    The crown was cheering, everyone was stoked (was stoked)
    I mean it was like the whole school was totally coked or something
    The band was playing Evergreen
    And all of a sudden somebody screamed
    Look out! The homecoming queenÕs got a gun
    Everybody run, the homecoming queenÕs got a gun
    Everybody run, the homecoming queen has got a gun
    DebbieÕs smiling and waving her gun
    Picking off cheerleaders one by one
    Oh BuffieÕs pompom just flew to bits
    Oh no, MitzieÕs head just did the splits
    God, my best friendÕs on a shooting spree
    Stop it, Debbie, youÕre embarrassing me
    How could you do what you just did
    Are you having a really bad period?
    Everybody run, the homecoming queenÕs got a gun
    Everybody run, the homecoming queen has got a gun
    Stop Debbie, youÕre making a mess
    Powder burns all over your dress
    An hour later the cops arrived
    By then the entire glee club had died, no big loss
    You wouldnÕt believe what they brought to stop her
    Tear gas, machine guns, even a chopper
    Throw down your gun and tierra and come out of the float
    Debbie didnÕt listen to what the cop said
    She aimed and fired and now the math teacherÕs dead
    Oh itÕs really sad but kind of a relief
    I mean, we had this big test coming up next week
    Everybody run, the homecoming queenÕs got a gun
    Everybody run, the homecoming queen has got a gun
    DebbieÕs really having a blast
    SheÕs wasting half of the class
    The cops fired a warning shot that blew her off the float
    I tried to scream "duck" but it stuck in my throat
    She hit the ground and did a flip it was real acrobatic
    But I was crying so hard I couldnÕt work my instamatic
    I ran down to Debbie, I had to find out
    What made her do it, whyÕd she freak out
    I saw the bullet had got her right in the ear
    I knew then the end was near
    So I ran down and I said, in her good ear, "Debbie, whyÕd you do it?"
    She raised her head, smiled, and said "aaaggghhhh I did it for Johnny"
    Johnny? Well like whoÕs Johnny? Answer me, Debbie, whoÕs Johnny?
    Does anybody here know Johnny? Are you Johnny?
    There was one guy named Johnny but he was a total geek, he always had food
    in his
    braces.
    Answer me, Debbie, whoÕs Johnny?
    Oh God this is like that move Citizen Kane you know where you later find out
    Rosebud
    was a sled.
    But weÕll never know who Johnny was because like sheÕs dead.
    Everybody run, the homecoming queenÕs got a gun
    Everybody run, the homecoming queen has got a
    Everybody run
    Everybody run, the homecoming queen has got a
     
    Consultant, Sep 3, 2004
    #66
  7. Stacy Brown

    catwalker63 Guest

    IFYPFY

    I disagree. I've read a couple of her books and was very disappointed in
    the writing. Flat. Like a computer wrote it using some formula. Also,
    much to melodramatic and tragic. You'd be better with Cathryn Coulter or
    Elizabeth Lowell.

    --
    Catwalker
    aka Pu$$y Feet
    BS, MCP

    "I don't want one of those systems based on the cellulite processor."
     
    catwalker63, Sep 3, 2004
    #67
  8. Stacy Brown

    catwalker63 Guest

    My sister dropped the phone in the cat's water dish and freaked 'cause
    she thought she was going to electrocute the person on the other end.
    She's a brunette. I'm blonde. Go figure.

    --
    Catwalker
    aka Pu$$y Feet
    BS, MCP

    "I don't want one of those systems based on the cellulite processor."
     
    catwalker63, Sep 3, 2004
    #68
  9. Stacy Brown

    Jtyc Guest

    I disagree. I've read a couple of her books and was very disappointed in
    I'm going to have to come clean here. I... well... I didn't actually
    read any of her books.


    You see, I uh... Well I was just trying to impress you.



    I apologize.
     
    Jtyc, Sep 3, 2004
    #69
  10. Stacy Brown

    catwalker63 Guest

    LOL! You needn't try to impress me by reading romance novels. I read
    everything, it's like breathing for me. What do you LIKE to read?
    Perhaps I can make a recommendation?

    --
    Catwalker
    aka Pu$$y Feet
    BS, MCP

    "I don't want one of those systems based on the cellulite processor."
     
    catwalker63, Sep 3, 2004
    #70
  11. circa Fri, 3 Sep 2004 14:58:35 -0700, in
    microsoft.public.cert.exam.mcse, Jtyc ([email protected]!)
    said,
    Thankfully, neither have I.
    Well, it's obvious you weren't trying to impress *me*.

    :p
     
    Laura A. Robinson, Sep 4, 2004
    #71
  12. circa Fri, 03 Sep 2004 10:03:20 -0700, in
    microsoft.public.cert.exam.mcse, Neil ()
    said,
    Hey!
     
    Laura A. Robinson, Sep 4, 2004
    #72
  13. circa Fri, 03 Sep 2004 06:19:13 -0700, in
    microsoft.public.cert.exam.mcse, Neil ()
    said,
    Oh...you mean you're not supposed to read Stephen King to kids?
    Whoops...
     
    Laura A. Robinson, Sep 4, 2004
    #73
  14. Stacy Brown

    Neil Guest

    she didn't, did she?
    ;)
     
    Neil, Sep 5, 2004
    #74
  15. Stacy Brown

    Neil Guest

    direct hit...
     
    Neil, Sep 5, 2004
    #75
  16. Stacy Brown

    Neil Guest

    babbling on and on again Laura A. Robinson
    oddly, they tend not to sleep when you do that. and I prefer them
    sleeping (here take another pill kid).

    besides if I want to create deeply disturbed children, I choose my own
    ....special....way of warping them, by example...

    my kids will be in therapy for decades.
     
    Neil, Sep 5, 2004
    #76
  17. circa Sun, 05 Sep 2004 11:50:33 -0700, in
    microsoft.public.cert.exam.mcse, Neil ()
    said,
    Post a BlondeStar link and die...
     
    Laura A. Robinson, Sep 5, 2004
    #77
  18. circa Sun, 05 Sep 2004 11:54:17 -0700, in
    microsoft.public.cert.exam.mcse, Neil ()
    said,
    I just give 'em back to their parents then.
    Send 'em to Auntie Laura...
    Egads! You haven't started them in it yet???
     
    Laura A. Robinson, Sep 5, 2004
    #78
  19. Stacy Brown

    Neil Guest

    babbling on and on again Laura A. Robinson
    http://humor.about.com/b/a/099764.htm
     
    Neil, Sep 6, 2004
    #79
  20. Stacy Brown

    Neil Guest

    babbling on and on again Laura A. Robinson
    I'm the parent so forget about that one...
    I will warp my children _myself_ thank you very much...
    ok, there are 2 problems with that. first, we've already determined I'm
    cheap (though I'm on the hook for a steak if you show up, so I may have
    to move in the very near future). If I take them to therapy now that will
    cost me. If I wait they'll pay it off themselves. Secondly, if I start
    them off now a therapist might be able to help them. If I wait I have
    more time to warp them before tehy can get to the help...
     
    Neil, Sep 6, 2004
    #80
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