Re: My plan of action

Discussion in 'Computer Support' started by Dan C, Nov 9, 2010.

  1. Dan C

    Dan C Guest

    On Mon, 08 Nov 2010 12:44:22 -0700, Brian Christiansen wrote:

    > The following is my plan of action, based on what I know about the
    > situation, suggestions made here, and some research I did on the
    > internet.
    >
    >
    > 1.. Back up all critical data to a memory stick, CD, whatever.
    >
    > 2.. Get computer running as best as possible using the following steps
    >
    > 1.. Remove windows XP and revert back to 98, or
    >
    > 2.. Do a clean install of 98 if the old recovery disks are still
    > around
    >
    > 3.. Determine what the computer is used for and remove all software
    > that
    > does not support that purpose or reinstall all software the supports
    > that purpose.
    >
    > 3.. See what can be done about connecting to the internet after those
    > things are completed.


    Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha!

    LOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    ROFL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Wanker.


    --
    "Ubuntu" -- an African word, meaning "Slackware is too hard for me".
    "Bother!" said Pooh, as he wiped the vomit from his chin.
    Usenet Improvement Project: http://twovoyagers.com/improve-usenet.org/
    Thanks, Obama: http://brandybuck.site40.net/pics/politica/thanks.jpg
     
    Dan C, Nov 9, 2010
    #1
    1. Advertising

  2. Dan C

    richard Guest

    On Mon, 8 Nov 2010 21:55:31 -0700, Brian Christiansen wrote:

    > "Dan C" <> wrote in message
    > news:p...
    >
    >> Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha!
    >>
    >> LOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >>
    >> ROFL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >>
    >> Wanker.
    >>

    > FOAD, jerkwad. This is a genuine problem that this person is having with
    > his computer, and this might be the best we can do without replacing the
    > computer. I am pretty sure that the church I am helping out has very
    > limited funds, even if it has the funds to do so easily, I just think that
    > in today's world, a church's funds should go toward something like donations
    > to the community food bank or something like that rather than updating
    > office equipment.
    >
    > Everyone else has been quite helpful in my deciding what to propose to this
    > man who needs help with his computer. If you can't be, then be a smartass
    > somewhere else.
    >
    > Brian Christiansen


    Dan is our resident imbecile who generally replies with "format your hard
    drive" for most answers.
    Just ignore his ignorance.
     
    richard, Nov 9, 2010
    #2
    1. Advertising

  3. Dan C

    Dan C Guest

    On Mon, 08 Nov 2010 21:55:31 -0700, Brian Christiansen wrote:

    > "Dan C" <> wrote in message
    > news:p...
    >
    >> Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha!
    >>
    >> LOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >>
    >> ROFL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >>
    >> Wanker.


    > FOAD, jerkwad.



    You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As we
    say in Texas, you couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions
    printed on the heel. You are a canker, an open wound. I would rather
    kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You took your last vacation in
    the Islets of Langerhans.

    You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little
    worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a
    cad, and a weasel. I take that back; you are a festering pustule on a
    weasel's rump. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench,
    a revulsion, an overflowing latrine, a big suck on a sour lemon.

    I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same
    species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at
    the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut.
    Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are
    a weed, a fungus, a stinking snotrag, the dregs of this earth. You are
    a technicolor yawn. And did I mention that you smell?

    You are a squeaking rat, a mistake of nature and a heavy-metal bagpipe
    player. You were not born. You were hatched into an unwilling world
    that rejects the likes of you. You didn't crawl out of a normal egg,
    either, but rather a mutant maggot egg rejected by an evil scientist
    as being below his low standards. Your alleged parents abandoned
    their bastard whelp at birth and then died of shame in recognition of
    what they had done to an unsuspecting world. They were a bit late.

    Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting
    to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a
    nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able
    to access it ever so much more rapidly. If cluelessness were crude
    oil, your scalp would be crawling with caribou.

    You are a thick-headed trog. I have seen skeet with more sense than
    you have. You are a few bricks short of a full load, a few cards short
    of a full deck, a few bytes short of a full core dump, and a few
    chromosomes short of a full genome. Worse than that, you top-post.
    In HTML. God created toads, houseflies, cockroaches, maggots, mosquitos,
    fleas, ticks,slugs, leeches, and intestinal parasites, then he lowered
    his standards and made you. I take it back; God didn't make you. You
    are Satan's spawn. You are Evil beyond comprehension, half-living in
    the slough of despair. You are the entropy which will claim us all.
    You are a green-nostriled, crossed eyed, microcephalous, hairy-livered
    inbred trout-defiler. You make Ebola look good.

    You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid,
    nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, an
    ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with
    you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in
    a land that reality forgot. You are not ANSI compliant and your markup
    doesn't validate. You have a couple of address lines shorted together.
    You should be promoted to Engineering Manager.

    Do you really expect your delusional and incoherent ramblings to be
    read? Everyone plonked you long ago. Do you fantasize that your
    tantrums and conniption fits could possibly be worth the $0.000000001
    worth of electricity used to send them? Your life is one big
    W.O.M.B.A.T. and your future doesn't look promising either. We need to
    trace your bloodline and terminate all siblings and cousins in order
    to cleanse humanity of your polluted genes. The good news is that no
    normal human would ever mate with you, so we won't have to go into the
    sewers in search of your git.

    You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and
    obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living
    emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a
    loathsome disease, a dung-bred maggot, a drooling inbred cross-eyed
    toesucker. You make Quakers shout and strike Pentecostals silent.

    You have a version 1.0 mind in a version 6.13 world. Your mother had
    to tie a pork chop around your neck just to get your dog to play with
    you. You think that HTTP://WWW.GUYMACON.COM/FUN/INSULT/INDEX.HTM is
    the name of a rock band. You believe that P.D.Q. Bach is the greatest
    composer who ever lived. You prefer L. Ron Hubbard to Larry Niven and
    Jerry Pournelle. Hee-Haw is too deep for you. You would watch test
    patterns all day if the other inmates would let you.

    On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are
    deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of
    wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted.
    Spammers look down on you. Phone sex operators hang up on you.
    Telemarketers refuse to be seen in public with you. You are the source
    of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.
    May you choke on your own foolish opinions. You are a Pusillanimous
    galactophage and you wear your sister's training bra. Don't bother
    opening the door when you leave - you should be able to slime your
    way out underneath. I hope that when you get home your mother runs
    out from under the porch and bites you.

    You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock.
    You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john. You clouted
    boggish foot-licking half-twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You
    gormless crook-pated tosser. You bloody churlish boil-brained clotpole
    ponce. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You cockered
    bum-bailey poofter. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You
    dread-bolted fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill. May your
    spouse be blessed with many bastards.

    You are so clueless that if you dressed in a clue skin, doused yourself
    in clue musk, and did the clue dance in the middle of a field of horny
    clues at the height of clue mating season, you still would not have a
    clue. If you were a movie you would be a double feature;
    _Battlefield_Earth_ and _Moron_Movies_II_. You would be out of focus.

    You are a fiend and a sniveling coward, and you have bad breath. You
    are the unholy spawn of a bandy-legged hobo and a syphilitic camel.
    You wear strangely mismatched clothing with oddly placed stains. You
    are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just knowing that
    you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go
    away. You are jetsam who dreams of becoming flotsam. You won't make
    it. I beg for sweet death to come and remove me from a world which
    became unbearable when you crawled out of a harpy's lair.

    It is hard to believe how incredibly stupid you are. Stupid as a stone
    that the other stones make fun of. So stupid that you have traveled
    far beyond stupid as we know it and into a new dimension of stupid.
    Meta-stupid. Stupid cubed. Trans-stupid stupid. Stupid collapsed to
    a singularity where even the stupons have collapsed into stuponium.
    Stupid so dense that no intelligence can escape. Singularity stupid.
    Blazing hot summer day on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one
    minute than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. It cannot
    be possible that anything in our universe can really be this stupid.
    This is a primordial fragment from the original big stupid bang. A pure
    extract of stupid with absolute stupid purity. Stupid beyond the laws
    of nature. I must apologize. I can't go on. This is my epiphany of
    stupid. After this experience, you may not hear from me for a while.
    I don't think that I can summon the strength left to mock your moronic
    opinions and malformed comments about boring trivia or your other
    drivel. Duh.

    The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped
    away most of your of what you wrote, because, well ... it didn't
    really say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative flame was
    pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a
    load of babbling was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, after
    you have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more
    success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us "normal"
    people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering.
    But we sometimes forget that there are "challenged" persons in this
    world who find these things to be difficult. If I had known that this
    was true in your case then I would have never have exposed myself to
    what you wrote. It just wouldn't have been "right." Sort of like
    parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the
    emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a
    demand on you.

    P.S.: You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful,
    cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable,
    belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal,
    fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic,
    brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame,
    self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent,
    libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, EDLINoid,
    illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking,
    devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic,
    fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased,
    suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim,
    crazy, weird, dyspeptic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim,
    unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive,
    mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive,
    abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, and Generally Not Good.

    I hope this helps...



    --
    "Ubuntu" -- an African word, meaning "Slackware is too hard for me".
    "Bother!" said Pooh, as Piglet refused to give him some Pooh-tang.
    Usenet Improvement Project: http://twovoyagers.com/improve-usenet.org/
    Thanks, Obama: http://brandybuck.site40.net/pics/politica/thanks.jpg
     
    Dan C, Nov 9, 2010
    #3
  4. Dan C

    OldGringo38 Guest

    On 11/9/2010 8:28 AM Just to please that super-ego, Dan C wrote the
    following tidbit of information:
    > On Mon, 08 Nov 2010 21:55:31 -0700, Brian Christiansen wrote:
    >
    >> "Dan C"<> wrote in message
    >> news:p...
    >>
    >>> Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha!
    >>>
    >>> LOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >>>
    >>> ROFL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >>>
    >>> Wanker.

    >
    >> FOAD, jerkwad.

    >
    >
    > You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As we
    > say in Texas, you couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions
    > printed on the heel. You are a canker, an open wound. I would rather
    > kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You took your last vacation in
    > the Islets of Langerhans.
    >
    > You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little
    > worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a
    > cad, and a weasel. I take that back; you are a festering pustule on a
    > weasel's rump. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench,
    > a revulsion, an overflowing latrine, a big suck on a sour lemon.
    >
    > I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same
    > species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at
    > the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut.
    > Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are
    > a weed, a fungus, a stinking snotrag, the dregs of this earth. You are
    > a technicolor yawn. And did I mention that you smell?
    >
    > You are a squeaking rat, a mistake of nature and a heavy-metal bagpipe
    > player. You were not born. You were hatched into an unwilling world
    > that rejects the likes of you. You didn't crawl out of a normal egg,
    > either, but rather a mutant maggot egg rejected by an evil scientist
    > as being below his low standards. Your alleged parents abandoned
    > their bastard whelp at birth and then died of shame in recognition of
    > what they had done to an unsuspecting world. They were a bit late.
    >
    > Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting
    > to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a
    > nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able
    > to access it ever so much more rapidly. If cluelessness were crude
    > oil, your scalp would be crawling with caribou.
    >
    > You are a thick-headed trog. I have seen skeet with more sense than
    > you have. You are a few bricks short of a full load, a few cards short
    > of a full deck, a few bytes short of a full core dump, and a few
    > chromosomes short of a full genome. Worse than that, you top-post.
    > In HTML. God created toads, houseflies, cockroaches, maggots, mosquitos,
    > fleas, ticks,slugs, leeches, and intestinal parasites, then he lowered
    > his standards and made you. I take it back; God didn't make you. You
    > are Satan's spawn. You are Evil beyond comprehension, half-living in
    > the slough of despair. You are the entropy which will claim us all.
    > You are a green-nostriled, crossed eyed, microcephalous, hairy-livered
    > inbred trout-defiler. You make Ebola look good.
    >
    > You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid,
    > nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, an
    > ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with
    > you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in
    > a land that reality forgot. You are not ANSI compliant and your markup
    > doesn't validate. You have a couple of address lines shorted together.
    > You should be promoted to Engineering Manager.
    >
    > Do you really expect your delusional and incoherent ramblings to be
    > read? Everyone plonked you long ago. Do you fantasize that your
    > tantrums and conniption fits could possibly be worth the $0.000000001
    > worth of electricity used to send them? Your life is one big
    > W.O.M.B.A.T. and your future doesn't look promising either. We need to
    > trace your bloodline and terminate all siblings and cousins in order
    > to cleanse humanity of your polluted genes. The good news is that no
    > normal human would ever mate with you, so we won't have to go into the
    > sewers in search of your git.
    >
    > You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and
    > obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living
    > emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a
    > loathsome disease, a dung-bred maggot, a drooling inbred cross-eyed
    > toesucker. You make Quakers shout and strike Pentecostals silent.
    >
    > You have a version 1.0 mind in a version 6.13 world. Your mother had
    > to tie a pork chop around your neck just to get your dog to play with
    > you. You think that HTTP://WWW.GUYMACON.COM/FUN/INSULT/INDEX.HTM is
    > the name of a rock band. You believe that P.D.Q. Bach is the greatest
    > composer who ever lived. You prefer L. Ron Hubbard to Larry Niven and
    > Jerry Pournelle. Hee-Haw is too deep for you. You would watch test
    > patterns all day if the other inmates would let you.
    >
    > On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are
    > deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of
    > wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted.
    > Spammers look down on you. Phone sex operators hang up on you.
    > Telemarketers refuse to be seen in public with you. You are the source
    > of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.
    > May you choke on your own foolish opinions. You are a Pusillanimous
    > galactophage and you wear your sister's training bra. Don't bother
    > opening the door when you leave - you should be able to slime your
    > way out underneath. I hope that when you get home your mother runs
    > out from under the porch and bites you.
    >
    > You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock.
    > You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john. You clouted
    > boggish foot-licking half-twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You
    > gormless crook-pated tosser. You bloody churlish boil-brained clotpole
    > ponce. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You cockered
    > bum-bailey poofter. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You
    > dread-bolted fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill. May your
    > spouse be blessed with many bastards.
    >
    > You are so clueless that if you dressed in a clue skin, doused yourself
    > in clue musk, and did the clue dance in the middle of a field of horny
    > clues at the height of clue mating season, you still would not have a
    > clue. If you were a movie you would be a double feature;
    > _Battlefield_Earth_ and _Moron_Movies_II_. You would be out of focus.
    >
    > You are a fiend and a sniveling coward, and you have bad breath. You
    > are the unholy spawn of a bandy-legged hobo and a syphilitic camel.
    > You wear strangely mismatched clothing with oddly placed stains. You
    > are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just knowing that
    > you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go
    > away. You are jetsam who dreams of becoming flotsam. You won't make
    > it. I beg for sweet death to come and remove me from a world which
    > became unbearable when you crawled out of a harpy's lair.
    >
    > It is hard to believe how incredibly stupid you are. Stupid as a stone
    > that the other stones make fun of. So stupid that you have traveled
    > far beyond stupid as we know it and into a new dimension of stupid.
    > Meta-stupid. Stupid cubed. Trans-stupid stupid. Stupid collapsed to
    > a singularity where even the stupons have collapsed into stuponium.
    > Stupid so dense that no intelligence can escape. Singularity stupid.
    > Blazing hot summer day on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one
    > minute than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. It cannot
    > be possible that anything in our universe can really be this stupid.
    > This is a primordial fragment from the original big stupid bang. A pure
    > extract of stupid with absolute stupid purity. Stupid beyond the laws
    > of nature. I must apologize. I can't go on. This is my epiphany of
    > stupid. After this experience, you may not hear from me for a while.
    > I don't think that I can summon the strength left to mock your moronic
    > opinions and malformed comments about boring trivia or your other
    > drivel. Duh.
    >
    > The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped
    > away most of your of what you wrote, because, well ... it didn't
    > really say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative flame was
    > pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a
    > load of babbling was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, after
    > you have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more
    > success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us "normal"
    > people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering.
    > But we sometimes forget that there are "challenged" persons in this
    > world who find these things to be difficult. If I had known that this
    > was true in your case then I would have never have exposed myself to
    > what you wrote. It just wouldn't have been "right." Sort of like
    > parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the
    > emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a
    > demand on you.
    >
    > P.S.: You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful,
    > cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable,
    > belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal,
    > fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic,
    > brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame,
    > self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent,
    > libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, EDLINoid,
    > illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking,
    > devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic,
    > fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased,
    > suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim,
    > crazy, weird, dyspeptic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim,
    > unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive,
    > mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive,
    > abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, and Generally Not Good.
    >
    > I hope this helps...
    >
    >
    >

    Dan, where the hell in Texas are you?

    --
    OldGringo38
    Just West Of Nowhere
    Enjoy Life And Live It To Its Fullest
    Support Bacteria: They Are The Only Culture Some People Have
     
    OldGringo38, Nov 9, 2010
    #4
  5. Dan C

    Dan C Guest

    On Tue, 09 Nov 2010 09:05:32 -0600, OldGringo38 wrote:

    > On 11/9/2010 8:28 AM Just to please that super-ego, Dan C wrote the
    > following tidbit of information:
    >> On Mon, 08 Nov 2010 21:55:31 -0700, Brian Christiansen wrote:
    >>
    >>> "Dan C"<> wrote in message
    >>> news:p...
    >>>
    >>>> Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha!
    >>>>
    >>>> LOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >>>>
    >>>> ROFL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >>>>
    >>>> Wanker.

    >>
    >>> FOAD, jerkwad.

    >>
    >>
    >> You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As we
    >> say in Texas, you couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions
    >> printed on the heel. You are a canker, an open wound. I would rather
    >> kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You took your last vacation in the
    >> Islets of Langerhans.
    >>
    >> You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little
    >> worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a
    >> cad, and a weasel. I take that back; you are a festering pustule on a
    >> weasel's rump. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench,
    >> a revulsion, an overflowing latrine, a big suck on a sour lemon.
    >>
    >> I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same
    >> species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the
    >> very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers
    >> avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed,
    >> a fungus, a stinking snotrag, the dregs of this earth. You are a
    >> technicolor yawn. And did I mention that you smell?
    >>
    >> You are a squeaking rat, a mistake of nature and a heavy-metal bagpipe
    >> player. You were not born. You were hatched into an unwilling world
    >> that rejects the likes of you. You didn't crawl out of a normal egg,
    >> either, but rather a mutant maggot egg rejected by an evil scientist as
    >> being below his low standards. Your alleged parents abandoned their
    >> bastard whelp at birth and then died of shame in recognition of what
    >> they had done to an unsuspecting world. They were a bit late.
    >>
    >> Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting to
    >> impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop
    >> will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it
    >> ever so much more rapidly. If cluelessness were crude oil, your scalp
    >> would be crawling with caribou.
    >>
    >> You are a thick-headed trog. I have seen skeet with more sense than you
    >> have. You are a few bricks short of a full load, a few cards short of a
    >> full deck, a few bytes short of a full core dump, and a few chromosomes
    >> short of a full genome. Worse than that, you top-post. In HTML. God
    >> created toads, houseflies, cockroaches, maggots, mosquitos, fleas,
    >> ticks,slugs, leeches, and intestinal parasites, then he lowered his
    >> standards and made you. I take it back; God didn't make you. You are
    >> Satan's spawn. You are Evil beyond comprehension, half-living in the
    >> slough of despair. You are the entropy which will claim us all. You are
    >> a green-nostriled, crossed eyed, microcephalous, hairy-livered inbred
    >> trout-defiler. You make Ebola look good.
    >>
    >> You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid,
    >> nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, an
    >> ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with
    >> you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in
    >> a land that reality forgot. You are not ANSI compliant and your markup
    >> doesn't validate. You have a couple of address lines shorted together.
    >> You should be promoted to Engineering Manager.
    >>
    >> Do you really expect your delusional and incoherent ramblings to be
    >> read? Everyone plonked you long ago. Do you fantasize that your
    >> tantrums and conniption fits could possibly be worth the $0.000000001
    >> worth of electricity used to send them? Your life is one big
    >> W.O.M.B.A.T. and your future doesn't look promising either. We need to
    >> trace your bloodline and terminate all siblings and cousins in order to
    >> cleanse humanity of your polluted genes. The good news is that no
    >> normal human would ever mate with you, so we won't have to go into the
    >> sewers in search of your git.
    >>
    >> You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and
    >> obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living
    >> emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a
    >> loathsome disease, a dung-bred maggot, a drooling inbred cross-eyed
    >> toesucker. You make Quakers shout and strike Pentecostals silent.
    >>
    >> You have a version 1.0 mind in a version 6.13 world. Your mother had to
    >> tie a pork chop around your neck just to get your dog to play with you.
    >> You think that HTTP://WWW.GUYMACON.COM/FUN/INSULT/INDEX.HTM is the name
    >> of a rock band. You believe that P.D.Q. Bach is the greatest composer
    >> who ever lived. You prefer L. Ron Hubbard to Larry Niven and Jerry
    >> Pournelle. Hee-Haw is too deep for you. You would watch test patterns
    >> all day if the other inmates would let you.
    >>
    >> On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are
    >> deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of
    >> wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted.
    >> Spammers look down on you. Phone sex operators hang up on you.
    >> Telemarketers refuse to be seen in public with you. You are the source
    >> of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.
    >> May you choke on your own foolish opinions. You are a Pusillanimous
    >> galactophage and you wear your sister's training bra. Don't bother
    >> opening the door when you leave - you should be able to slime your way
    >> out underneath. I hope that when you get home your mother runs out from
    >> under the porch and bites you.
    >>
    >> You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock.
    >> You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john. You clouted
    >> boggish foot-licking half-twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You
    >> gormless crook-pated tosser. You bloody churlish boil-brained clotpole
    >> ponce. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You cockered
    >> bum-bailey poofter. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You
    >> dread-bolted fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill. May your
    >> spouse be blessed with many bastards.
    >>
    >> You are so clueless that if you dressed in a clue skin, doused yourself
    >> in clue musk, and did the clue dance in the middle of a field of horny
    >> clues at the height of clue mating season, you still would not have a
    >> clue. If you were a movie you would be a double feature;
    >> _Battlefield_Earth_ and _Moron_Movies_II_. You would be out of focus.
    >>
    >> You are a fiend and a sniveling coward, and you have bad breath. You
    >> are the unholy spawn of a bandy-legged hobo and a syphilitic camel. You
    >> wear strangely mismatched clothing with oddly placed stains. You are
    >> degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just knowing that you
    >> exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away.
    >> You are jetsam who dreams of becoming flotsam. You won't make it. I beg
    >> for sweet death to come and remove me from a world which became
    >> unbearable when you crawled out of a harpy's lair.
    >>
    >> It is hard to believe how incredibly stupid you are. Stupid as a stone
    >> that the other stones make fun of. So stupid that you have traveled far
    >> beyond stupid as we know it and into a new dimension of stupid.
    >> Meta-stupid. Stupid cubed. Trans-stupid stupid. Stupid collapsed to a
    >> singularity where even the stupons have collapsed into stuponium.
    >> Stupid so dense that no intelligence can escape. Singularity stupid.
    >> Blazing hot summer day on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one
    >> minute than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. It cannot
    >> be possible that anything in our universe can really be this stupid.
    >> This is a primordial fragment from the original big stupid bang. A pure
    >> extract of stupid with absolute stupid purity. Stupid beyond the laws
    >> of nature. I must apologize. I can't go on. This is my epiphany of
    >> stupid. After this experience, you may not hear from me for a while. I
    >> don't think that I can summon the strength left to mock your moronic
    >> opinions and malformed comments about boring trivia or your other
    >> drivel. Duh.
    >>
    >> The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped
    >> away most of your of what you wrote, because, well ... it didn't really
    >> say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative flame was
    >> pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a
    >> load of babbling was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, after you
    >> have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more
    >> success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us "normal"
    >> people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering.
    >> But we sometimes forget that there are "challenged" persons in this
    >> world who find these things to be difficult. If I had known that this
    >> was true in your case then I would have never have exposed myself to
    >> what you wrote. It just wouldn't have been "right." Sort of like
    >> parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the
    >> emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand
    >> on you.
    >>
    >> P.S.: You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful,
    >> cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable,
    >> belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal,
    >> fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic,
    >> brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame,
    >> self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent,
    >> libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, EDLINoid,
    >> illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking,
    >> devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic,
    >> fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased,
    >> suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim,
    >> crazy, weird, dyspeptic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim,
    >> unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive,
    >> mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive, abusive,
    >> socially-retarded, puerile, and Generally Not Good.
    >>
    >> I hope this helps...
    >>
    >>


    > Dan, where the hell in Texas are you?


    I'm not actually in Texas. I'm incognito.


    --
    "Ubuntu" -- an African word, meaning "Slackware is too hard for me".
    "Bother!" said Pooh, as he inhaled.
    Usenet Improvement Project: http://twovoyagers.com/improve-usenet.org/
    Thanks, Obama: http://brandybuck.site40.net/pics/politica/thanks.jpg
     
    Dan C, Nov 10, 2010
    #5
  6. Dan C

    anyone Guest

    On Mon, 08 Nov 2010 22:47:32 -0700, richard wrote:

    > On Mon, 8 Nov 2010 21:55:31 -0700, Brian Christiansen wrote:
    >
    >> "Dan C" <> wrote in message
    >> news:p...
    >>
    >>> Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha!
    >>>
    >>> LOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >>>
    >>> ROFL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    >>>
    >>> Wanker.
    >>>

    >> FOAD, jerkwad. This is a genuine problem that this person is having
    >> with his computer, and this might be the best we can do without
    >> replacing the computer. I am pretty sure that the church I am helping
    >> out has very limited funds, even if it has the funds to do so easily, I
    >> just think that in today's world, a church's funds should go toward
    >> something like donations to the community food bank or something like
    >> that rather than updating office equipment.
    >>
    >> Everyone else has been quite helpful in my deciding what to propose to
    >> this man who needs help with his computer. If you can't be, then be a
    >> smartass somewhere else.
    >>
    >> Brian Christiansen

    >
    > Dan is our resident imbecile who generally replies with "format your
    > hard drive" for most answers.
    > Just ignore his ignorance.


    <blink> <blink>

    (scrolls up...)

    WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!
     
    anyone, Nov 13, 2010
    #6
    1. Advertising

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