OT Wednesday Funny

Discussion in 'MCSE' started by Consultant, Dec 8, 2004.

  1. Consultant

    Consultant Guest

    A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an
    organization.

    Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed that
    the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed
    a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I noticed
    he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around saw that all
    the staff had spoons in their pockets.

    When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?"

    "Well, "he explained, "the restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting

    to revamp all our processes. After several months of analysis, they
    concluded

    that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop

    frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are
    better

    prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15
    man-hours per shift."

    As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with
    his spare.

    "I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an
    extra trip to get it right now."

    I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the
    waiter's fly. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same
    string hanging from their flies. So before he walked off, I asked the
    waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right
    there?"

    "Oh, certainly!" Then he lowered his voice. "Not everyone is so observant.
    That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time in the
    restroom. By tying this string to the tip of you know what, we can pull it
    out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening
    the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent.

    I asked "After you get it out, how do you put it back?"

    "Well," he whispered, "I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon."
    Consultant, Dec 8, 2004
    #1
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  2. Consultant

    T-Bone Guest

    "Consultant" <consultant_mcngp@yahoodotcom> wrote
    > A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an
    > organization.


    Well, now I have to requisition a new keyboard. This one's got coffee all
    over it.

    T-Bone
    MCNGP XL
    rotflmao
    T-Bone, Dec 8, 2004
    #2
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  3. Consultant

    JaR Guest

    In microsoft.public.cert.exam.mcse, T-Bone climbed on a soapbox & opined:

    > "Consultant" <consultant_mcngp@yahoodotcom> wrote
    >> A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an
    >> organization.

    >
    > Well, now I have to requisition a new keyboard. This one's got coffee all
    > over it.
    >


    Does M'sieu require a new spoon?

    JaR
    Maitre d'Thug
    JaR, Dec 8, 2004
    #3
  4. Consultant

    Neil Guest

    did you hear JaR <> say in
    news:Xns95B98C7BD6D81plentespamsuxsofthom@207.46.248.16:

    > Does M'sieu require a new spoon?


    no, I don't have a string hanging out of my fly....

    --
    Neil MCNGP #30
    "Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to
    learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for
    their apparent disinclination to do so."
    -- a quote by Doug Adams (Author of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)
    Neil, Dec 9, 2004
    #4
  5. Consultant

    JaR Guest

    In microsoft.public.cert.exam.mcse, Neil climbed on a soapbox & opined:

    > did you hear JaR <> say in
    > news:Xns95B98C7BD6D81plentespamsuxsofthom@207.46.248.16:
    >
    >> Does M'sieu require a new spoon?

    >
    > no, I don't have a string hanging out of my fly....
    >


    My, that is a handsome non-sequitur you have there. Is it house trained?

    JaR
    Diverted Thug
    JaR, Dec 9, 2004
    #5
  6. Consultant

    catwalker63 Guest

    I don't even know why I go out to eat anymore. <sigh>

    --
    Catwalker
    aka Pu$$y Feet
    BS, MCP
    MCNGP #43

    "I'm not bossy! I just know what you should be doing!"
    catwalker63, Dec 10, 2004
    #6
  7. Consultant

    Neil Guest

    did you hear catwalker63 <> say in
    news:Xns95BAA9C664498catwalker63athotmail@216.196.97.136:

    > I don't even know why I go out to eat anymore. <sigh>


    make sure everything is "two way" food...

    --
    Neil MCNGP #30
    "Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to
    learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for
    their apparent disinclination to do so."
    -- a quote by Doug Adams (Author of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)
    Neil, Dec 10, 2004
    #7
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