[OT] Doggone wheatbacks C&C

Discussion in 'MCSE' started by JaR, Dec 9, 2004.

  1. JaR

    JaR Guest

    Found in another froup. Enjoy.

    JaR


    Tuesday, November 16, 2004 The Columbus Dispatch

    The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada
    has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols
    to stop the illegal immigration. The re-election of President Bush is
    prompting the exodus among left leaning citizens who fear they'll soon
    be required to hunt, and agree with Bill O'Reilly.

    Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology
    professors, animal rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields
    at night. "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a
    Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red
    Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. The producer was cold,
    exhausted and hungry. "He asked me if I could spare a latte and some
    free-range. When I said I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a
    chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"

    In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected fences, but
    the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blare
    Rush Limbaugh across fields. "Not real effective," he said. "The
    liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they
    wouldn't give milk."

    Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet near the
    Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them across
    the border and leave them to fend for themselves. "A lot of these people
    are not prepared for rugged conditions" an Ontario border patrolman
    said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. They did
    have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though." When liberals are
    caught, they're sent back across the border, wailing loudly that they
    fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about
    the Bush administration establishing re-education camps in which
    liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR.

    In the days since the election, liberals have turned to sometimes
    ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as
    senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs.
    After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs,
    Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the
    supposed senior-citizen passengers. "If they can't identify the
    accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about
    their age," an official said. Canadian citizens have complained that the
    illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting
    all the good Susan Sarandon movies. "I feel sorry for American liberals,
    but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident
    said. ''How many art-history majors does one country need?"

    In an effort to ease tensions between the United States and Canada, Vice
    President Dick Cheney met with the Canadian ambassador and pledged that
    the administration would take steps to reassure liberals, a source close
    to Cheney said "We're going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts.
    And we might put some endangered species on postage stamps. The
    president is determined to reach out."
    JaR, Dec 9, 2004
    #1
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  2. JaR

    Neil Guest

    did you hear JaR <> say in
    news:Xns95BA9FB90A0E8plentespamsuxsofthom@207.46.248.16:

    > Found in another froup. Enjoy.
    >
    > JaR
    >
    >
    > Tuesday, November 16, 2004 The Columbus Dispatch
    >
    > The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada
    > has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols
    > to s

    <kerschnipety>

    old and please stop sending them up here...

    --
    Neil MCNGP #30
    "Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to
    learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for
    their apparent disinclination to do so."
    -- a quote by Doug Adams (Author of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)
    Neil, Dec 10, 2004
    #2
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  3. >We're going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts

    what about some cat stevens as well!

    Kline Sphere (Chalk) MCNGP #3
    The Poster Formerly Known as Kline Sphere, Dec 10, 2004
    #3
  4. JaR

    Mike T. Guest

    "The Poster Formerly Known as Kline Sphere" <.> schrieb im Newsbeitrag
    news:...
    > >We're going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts

    >
    > what about some cat stevens as well!
    >


    I guess Pantera would be out of the question at this point.
    /nonsmoking, please

    --
    Mike T.
    MCNGP #XLI
    Hellbound Thug
    Mike T., Dec 11, 2004
    #4
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