Maybe Funny:

Discussion in 'Computer Support' started by x@y, Feb 11, 2007.

  1. x@y

    x@y Guest

    Subject: Funny.


    >
    > AN OLD FARMER WENT TO TOWN TO SEE A MOVIE.
    > THE TICKET AGENT ASKED, "SIR, WHAT'S THAT ON YOUR SHOULDER?"
    > THE OLD FARMER SAID, "Oh, THAT'S MY PET ROOSTER, CHUCKY. WHEREVER I GO,
    > CHUCKY GOES."
    > "I AM SORRY SIR," SAID THE TICKET AGENT. "WE CAN'T ALLOW ANIMALS IN THE
    > THEATER."
    > THE OLD FARMER WENT AROUND THE CORNER AND STUFFED THE BIRD DOWN HIS
    > OVERALLS. HE RETURNED TO THE BOOTH, BOUGHT A TICKET AND ENTERED THE
    > THEATER. HE SAT DOWN NEXT TO TWO OLD WIDOWS NAMED MILDRED AND MARGE.
    > THE MOVIE STARTED AND THE ROOSTER BEGAN TO SQUIRM.
    > THE OLD FARMER UNBUTTONED HIS FLY SO CHUCKY COULD STICK HIS HEAD OUT
    > AND WATCH THE MOVIE.
    > "MARGE," WHISPERED MILDRED.
    > "WHAT?" SAID MARGE.
    > "I THINK THE GUY NEXT TO ME IS A PERVERT."
    > "WHAT MAKES YOU THINK SO?" ASKED MARGE.
    > "HE UNDID HIS PANTS AND HE HAS HIS THING OUT," WHISPERED MILDRED.
    > "WELL, DON'T WORRY A BOUT IT," SAID MARGE. "HELL, AT OUR AGE WE'VE SEEN
    > 'EM ALL"
    > "I THOUGHT SO TOO," SAID MILDRED,
    > "BUT THIS ONE'S EATIN' MY POPCORN!"
    x@y, Feb 11, 2007
    #1
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  2. x@y

    Tester Guest

    On Sun, 11 Feb 2007 13:51:08 -0600, "x@y" <> wrote:

    >
    >Subject: Funny.
    >
    >
    >>
    >> AN OLD FARMER WENT TO TOWN TO SEE A MOVIE.
    >> THE TICKET AGENT ASKED, "SIR, WHAT'S THAT ON YOUR SHOULDER?"
    >> THE OLD FARMER SAID, "Oh, THAT'S MY PET ROOSTER, CHUCKY. WHEREVER I GO,
    >> CHUCKY GOES."


    Supposedly true - seen in a weekly San Francisco newspaper in 1989,
    after the Loma Prieta earthquake. I can confirm that S.F. buses
    allowed animals with sufficient restraint and an extra fare during
    non-rush hours.

    Woman gets on #30 Stockton trolleybus in San Francisco Chinatown
    holding a live chicken just purchased at a nearby market.

    Driver: "Ma'am, you have to pay an extra fare for live animals."

    Woman strangles chicken on the spot.

    Of course, one doesn't expect a cbicken purchased at a Chinatown
    market to live long and prosper but... I should note that my
    (non-Chinese) maternal grandmother purchased live chickens but she
    didn't take them home alive.

    --
    Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com
    Tester, Feb 11, 2007
    #2
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  3. x@y

    philo Guest

    "x@y" <> wrote in message
    news:45cf4160$...
    >
    > Subject: Funny.
    >
    >



    <snip>

    no...don't start out with "maybe funny"

    you need to first clear your throat ...
    then state firmly:

    this is a joke




    --
    Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com
    philo, Feb 11, 2007
    #3
  4. x@y

    ian field Guest

    "philo" <> wrote in message
    news:45cf70f6$0$16325$...
    >
    > "x@y" <> wrote in message
    > news:45cf4160$...
    >>
    >> Subject: Funny.
    >>
    >>

    >
    >
    > <snip>
    >
    > no...don't start out with "maybe funny"
    >
    > you need to first clear your throat ...
    > then state firmly:
    >
    > this is a joke


    http://www.bulldotshit.com/media/Armagg~1.wav
    ian field, Feb 11, 2007
    #4
  5. x@y

    philo Guest


    > >
    > > <snip>
    > >
    > > no...don't start out with "maybe funny"
    > >
    > > you need to first clear your throat ...
    > > then state firmly:
    > >
    > > this is a joke

    >
    > Will try on my next one, Thanks Philo
    >



    When ever I tell a joke...
    I get lots of laughter...
    but no one is laughing at my joke...

    they laugh because my delivery is so inept



    --
    Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com
    philo, Feb 12, 2007
    #5
  6. x@y

    ian field Guest

    "philo" <> wrote in message
    news:45d05a66$0$16324$...
    >
    >
    >> >
    >> > <snip>
    >> >
    >> > no...don't start out with "maybe funny"
    >> >
    >> > you need to first clear your throat ...
    >> > then state firmly:
    >> >
    >> > this is a joke

    >>
    >> Will try on my next one, Thanks Philo
    >>

    >
    >
    > When ever I tell a joke...
    > I get lots of laughter...
    > but no one is laughing at my joke...
    >
    > they laugh because my delivery is so inept


    Uncontrollable flatulence works too!
    ian field, Feb 12, 2007
    #6
  7. ian field wrote:
    > "philo" <> wrote in message
    > news:45d05a66$0$16324$...
    >>When ever I tell a joke...
    >>I get lots of laughter...
    >>but no one is laughing at my joke...
    >>
    >>they laugh because my delivery is so inept

    >
    >
    > Uncontrollable flatulence works too!


    I've used that some but get nastygrams from the EPA.
    --
    Global warming my ass.
    =?ISO-8859-1?Q?R=F4g=EAr?=, Feb 13, 2007
    #7
  8. x@y

    ian field Guest

    "Rôgêr" <> wrote in message
    news:45d117ae$0$32460$...
    > ian field wrote:
    >> "philo" <> wrote in message
    >> news:45d05a66$0$16324$...
    >>>When ever I tell a joke...
    >>>I get lots of laughter...
    >>>but no one is laughing at my joke...
    >>>
    >>>they laugh because my delivery is so inept

    >>
    >>
    >> Uncontrollable flatulence works too!

    >
    > I've used that some but get nastygrams from the EPA.
    > --
    > Global warming my ass.


    Eat plenty of curry and light the gas - more particulates, less CO2.
    ian field, Feb 13, 2007
    #8
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