How to get rid of a beer belly ??

Discussion in 'Computer Support' started by Synapse Syndrome, Mar 10, 2007.

  1. I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for women.
    How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need to do?

    Genuine answers appreciated.

    ss.
     
    Synapse Syndrome, Mar 10, 2007
    #1
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  2. "Synapse Syndrome" <>
    wrote in news::
    >
    > I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly.
    > This is bad news for women. How do I get rid
    > of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I
    > need to do?
    >
    > Genuine answers appreciated.
    >
    > ss.


    Depending upon your age, the first thing you should do is
    see your doctor and make sure that your abdominal muscle
    structure is intact; to wit, no hernias, etc. Then inform
    him of your intentions so he can check your cardo-pullamary's
    and then if all is "A-OK and counting" [brace yo'self, now]:

    1,000 [correct] situps a day (~30 minutes at fruition)
    A slant-board will dramatically increse your results.

    That's your target. It can be done, especially at first,
    incrementally - but say you can only do 100 at at time;
    then you need to increase the total to ~2,000; or if you
    can only do 200 at a time; then increase total to ~1,500;
    etc.

    If you can only do 25 - then do them. But don't quit, and
    try to do a few more each day. If you can only do 10 at
    a time, and you approach it diligently, you'll see results
    in 3 weeks (~21 days) *guaranteed*!

    Jolly good, and best 'o luck to ya!

    --

    The personification of "ambition" is a flea
    crawling up an elephant's tail with rape on its mind.

    The personification of "delusion" is that flea
    arriving at its climax screaming "suffer baby, suffer."
     
    Bucky Breeder, Mar 10, 2007
    #2
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  3. Synapse Syndrome

    tom Guest

    "Synapse Syndrome" <> wrote in message
    news:...
    >
    > I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for

    women.
    > How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need to do?
    >
    > Genuine answers appreciated.
    >
    > ss.


    Lay off the suds................
     
    tom, Mar 10, 2007
    #3
  4. Synapse Syndrome

    philo Guest


    > >
    > > I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for

    > women.
    > > How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need to do?
    > >
    > > Genuine answers appreciated.
    > >
    > > ss.

    >
    > Lay off the suds................
    >
    >



    Yep...
    since I've quit drinking and started taking regular walks...

    BTW: walking a mile a day is really very easy

    i've gone back to just five pounds over my weight from 30 years ago!



    --
    Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com
     
    philo, Mar 10, 2007
    #4
  5. Synapse Syndrome

    doS Guest

    old fcker ;-)

    "philo" <> wrote in message
    news:45f2ad44$0$16384$...
    >
    >
    >> >
    >> > I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for

    >> women.
    >> > How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need to
    >> > do?
    >> >
    >> > Genuine answers appreciated.
    >> >
    >> > ss.

    >>
    >> Lay off the suds................
    >>
    >>

    >
    >
    > Yep...
    > since I've quit drinking and started taking regular walks...
    >
    > BTW: walking a mile a day is really very easy
    >
    > i've gone back to just five pounds over my weight from 30 years ago!
    >
    >
    >
    > --
    > Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com
    >
     
    doS, Mar 10, 2007
    #5
  6. Synapse Syndrome

    Mhzjunkie Guest

    Synapse Syndrome spewed out this bit, and i'll scatter a few bits myself:

    > I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for
    > women. How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I
    > need to do?
    >
    > Genuine answers appreciated.


    http://www.angelfire.com/super/mhzjunkie/perfectg.jpg

    --
    Mhzjunkie

    1 PRINT "Windows Vista ERROR"
    GOTO 1
    END
     
    Mhzjunkie, Mar 10, 2007
    #6
  7. Synapse Syndrome

    Rick Merrill Guest

    Synapse Syndrome wrote:
    > I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for women.
    > How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need to do?
    >
    > Genuine answers appreciated.
    >
    > ss.
    >
    >



    Fast for 1 meal a day; learn HOW to do sit-ups: roll head, shoulders,
    back (not all the way up either) - if you do it wrong you can place
    too much stress on your lower back, esp. when first starting.

    How many you can do depends on your age.

    Also touch your toes (or try to) ...

    Consult a doctor.
     
    Rick Merrill, Mar 10, 2007
    #7
  8. Synapse Syndrome

    philo Guest

    "doS" <> wrote in message
    news:LYyIh.6$...
    > old fcker ;-)
    >




    It's hard to believe how old I am...
    there were still steam locomotives when I was a kid !
    my computer is powered by kerosene though <G>



    --
    Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com
     
    philo, Mar 10, 2007
    #8
  9. Synapse Syndrome

    Mhzjunkie Guest

    philo spewed out this bit, and i'll scatter a few bits myself:

    > "doS" <> wrote in message
    > news:LYyIh.6$...
    >> old fcker ;-)
    >>

    >
    >
    >
    > It's hard to believe how old I am...
    > there were still steam locomotives when I was a kid !
    > my computer is powered by kerosene though <G>


    LOL !

    --
    Mhzjunkie

    1 PRINT "Windows Vista ERROR"
    GOTO 1
    END
     
    Mhzjunkie, Mar 10, 2007
    #9
  10. Synapse Syndrome

    doS Guest

    harrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

    "Mhzjunkie" <> wrote in message
    news:esuirb$qf6$...
    > Synapse Syndrome spewed out this bit, and i'll scatter a few bits myself:
    >> I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for
    >> women. How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I
    >> need to do? Genuine answers appreciated.

    >
    > http://www.angelfire.com/super/mhzjunkie/perfectg.jpg
    >
    > --
    > Mhzjunkie
    >
    > 1 PRINT "Windows Vista ERROR"
    > GOTO 1
    > END
    >
    >
     
    doS, Mar 10, 2007
    #10
  11. Synapse Syndrome

    ian field Guest

    "Synapse Syndrome" <> wrote in message
    news:...
    >
    > I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for
    > women. How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need
    > to do?
    >
    > Genuine answers appreciated.
    >
    > ss.
    >


    Apparently Australian wimmin refer to a beer gut as "toy shop under the
    veranda".
     
    ian field, Mar 10, 2007
    #11
  12. Synapse Syndrome

    WhzzKdd Guest

    "philo" <> wrote in message
    news:45f2ad44$0$16384$...
    >
    >
    >> >
    >> > I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for

    >> women.
    >> > How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need to
    >> > do?
    >> >
    >> > Genuine answers appreciated.
    >> >
    >> > ss.

    >>
    >> Lay off the suds................
    >>
    >>

    >
    >
    > Yep...
    > since I've quit drinking and started taking regular walks...
    >
    > BTW: walking a mile a day is really very easy
    >
    > i've gone back to just five pounds over my weight from 30 years ago!
    >
    >

    Concur. I lost over 10 pounds in 2 months last spring. And my basset hound
    lost 6 <g>. I got to where we could 1.5 miles in just under 20 minutes.
    Those little basset legs were really flying ;)
     
    WhzzKdd, Mar 10, 2007
    #12
  13. Synapse Syndrome

    philo Guest

    "Rick Merrill" <> wrote in message
    news:...
    > Synapse Syndrome wrote:
    > > I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for

    women.
    > > How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need to do?
    > >
    > > Genuine answers appreciated.
    > >
    > > ss.
    > >
    > >

    >
    >
    > Fast for 1 meal a day; learn HOW to do sit-ups: roll head, shoulders,
    > back (not all the way up either) - if you do it wrong you can place
    > too much stress on your lower back, esp. when first starting.
    >
    > How many you can do depends on your age.
    >
    > Also touch your toes (or try to) ...
    >
    > Consult a doctor.



    All those exercises may be fine...but walking works...
    and is very eay to do...

    of course one has to lay off the beer !!!!



    --
    Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com
     
    philo, Mar 10, 2007
    #13
  14. Just DIVORCE her!!!! Then marry a better one! You can pick and choose. Women
    are like stock-splits: there's another younger and prettier one coming along
    every 10 minutes between the opening and closing bells.


    "Synapse Syndrome" <> wrote in
    news::

    >
    > I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for
    > women. How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need
    > to do?
    >
    > Genuine answers appreciated.
    >
    > ss.
    >
    >
    >
     
    Graham Wellington, III, Mar 10, 2007
    #14
  15. Synapse Syndrome

    WhzzKdd Guest

    "Rick Merrill" <> wrote in message
    news:...
    > Synapse Syndrome wrote:
    >> I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for
    >> women. How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need
    >> to do?
    >>
    >> Genuine answers appreciated.
    >>

    >
    > Fast for 1 meal a day; learn HOW to do sit-ups: roll head, shoulders,
    > back (not all the way up either) - if you do it wrong you can place
    > too much stress on your lower back, esp. when first starting.
    >
    > How many you can do depends on your age.
    >
    > Also touch your toes (or try to) ...
    >

    I did that once. Hurt for weeks <g>
     
    WhzzKdd, Mar 10, 2007
    #15
  16. Synapse Syndrome

    meerkat Guest

    "WhzzKdd" <frack_this@email_is.invalid> wrote in message
    news:CgBIh.13$...
    > "Rick Merrill" <> wrote in message
    > news:...
    >> Synapse Syndrome wrote:
    >>> I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for
    >>> women. How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I need
    >>> to do?
    >>>
    >>> Genuine answers appreciated.
    >>>

    >>
    >> Fast for 1 meal a day; learn HOW to do sit-ups: roll head, shoulders,
    >> back (not all the way up either) - if you do it wrong you can place
    >> too much stress on your lower back, esp. when first starting.
    >>
    >> How many you can do depends on your age.
    >>
    >> Also touch your toes (or try to) ...
    >>

    > I did that once. Hurt for weeks <g>
    >

    I always get the wife to touch my toes.
    It doesn`t hurt so much <g>.
     
    meerkat, Mar 10, 2007
    #16
  17. On 2007-03-10, in 24hoursupport.helpdesk, philo waxed eloquently:
    snip

    >
    > of course one has to lay off the beer !!!!
    >
    >
    >


    Lay off the BEER!!11!! Sacrilege!! The very idea! Lay off the
    BEER....

    Go wash your mouth out with soap...

    --
    The Old Sourdough
    The default Magic Word, "Abracadabra", actually is a corruption of the
    Hebrew phrase "ha-Bracha dab'ra" which means "pronounce the blessing".
     
    The Old Sourdough, Mar 10, 2007
    #17
  18. On 2007-03-10, in 24hoursupport.helpdesk, philo waxed eloquently:
    >
    > "doS" <> wrote in message
    > news:LYyIh.6$...
    >> old fcker ;-)
    >>

    >
    >
    >
    > It's hard to believe how old I am...
    > there were still steam locomotives when I was a kid !
    > my computer is powered by kerosene though <G>
    >
    >
    >


    Mine's powered by my fingers, but I've got a touch of arthritis, and the
    little beads don't move as fast as they used to

    --
    The Old Sourdough
    I'm hungry, time to eat lunch.
     
    The Old Sourdough, Mar 10, 2007
    #18
  19. Synapse Syndrome

    meerkat Guest

    "The Old Sourdough" <> wrote in message
    news:...
    > On 2007-03-10, in 24hoursupport.helpdesk, philo waxed eloquently:
    > snip
    >
    > The Old Sourdough
    > The default Magic Word, "Abracadabra", actually is a corruption of the
    > Hebrew phrase "ha-Bracha dab'ra" which means "pronounce the blessing".
    >

    Wow, I feel better now I know that <g>.
     
    meerkat, Mar 10, 2007
    #19
  20. Synapse Syndrome

    WhzzKdd Guest

    "meerkat" <> wrote in message
    news:mvBIh.57126$...
    >
    > "WhzzKdd" <frack_this@email_is.invalid> wrote in message
    > news:CgBIh.13$...
    >> "Rick Merrill" <> wrote in message
    >> news:...
    >>> Synapse Syndrome wrote:
    >>>> I have noticed that I am getting a beer belly. This is bad news for
    >>>> women. How do I get rid of it and regain a flat stomach? What do I
    >>>> need to do?
    >>>>
    >>>> Genuine answers appreciated.
    >>>>
    >>>
    >>> Fast for 1 meal a day; learn HOW to do sit-ups: roll head, shoulders,
    >>> back (not all the way up either) - if you do it wrong you can place
    >>> too much stress on your lower back, esp. when first starting.
    >>>
    >>> How many you can do depends on your age.
    >>>
    >>> Also touch your toes (or try to) ...
    >>>

    >> I did that once. Hurt for weeks <g>
    >>

    > I always get the wife to touch my toes.
    > It doesn`t hurt so much <g>.
    >

    Great plan ;)
     
    WhzzKdd, Mar 10, 2007
    #20
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