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OT: SQL humor

 
 
FrisbeeŽ
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-15-2007
"The Rev [MCT]" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:%(E-Mail Removed)...
> CREATE PROC up_stealidentity
> WITH ENCRYPTION AS
>
> --BEGIN PROC
>
> DECLARE @hIdentity varchar(20)
>
> USE TEMPDB
> GO
>
> CREATE TABLE #FakeIdentity
> (fname varchar(50),
> lname varchar,(50),
> ssid int (9),
> birthdate date)
>
> INSERT INTO #FakeIdentity
> VALUES ('Butt', 'Pirate', 123456789, '12-31-1999')
> GO
>
> USE Mankind
> GO
>
> SELECT * FROM RevLife
> INTO RevLifeBackup
> GO
>
> TRUNCATE RevLife
> GO
>
> SELECT * FROM @hIdentity
> INTO RevLife
> GO
>
> TRUNCATE @hIdentity
> GO
>
> INSERT INTO @hIdentity(fname,lname, ssid, birthdate)
> SELECT fname, lname, ssid, birthdate
> FROM #FakeIdentity
> GO
>
> USE TEMPDB
> DROP #FakeIdentiyy
> GO
>
> --END PROC
>
>
>
>
> EXEC up_stealidentity KGPLife


Thanks for reminding me why I never took any SQL exams.


 
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The Rev [MCT]
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-15-2007
LOL

--
..rev

"It is the mark of an educated man to be able to entertain a thought without
accepting it"
~Aristotle
..
"FrisbeeŽ" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:(E-Mail Removed)...
> "The Rev [MCT]" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
> news:%(E-Mail Removed)...
>> CREATE PROC up_stealidentity
>> WITH ENCRYPTION AS
>>
>> --BEGIN PROC
>>
>> DECLARE @hIdentity varchar(20)
>>
>> USE TEMPDB
>> GO
>>
>> CREATE TABLE #FakeIdentity
>> (fname varchar(50),
>> lname varchar,(50),
>> ssid int (9),
>> birthdate date)
>>
>> INSERT INTO #FakeIdentity
>> VALUES ('Butt', 'Pirate', 123456789, '12-31-1999')
>> GO
>>
>> USE Mankind
>> GO
>>
>> SELECT * FROM RevLife
>> INTO RevLifeBackup
>> GO
>>
>> TRUNCATE RevLife
>> GO
>>
>> SELECT * FROM @hIdentity
>> INTO RevLife
>> GO
>>
>> TRUNCATE @hIdentity
>> GO
>>
>> INSERT INTO @hIdentity(fname,lname, ssid, birthdate)
>> SELECT fname, lname, ssid, birthdate
>> FROM #FakeIdentity
>> GO
>>
>> USE TEMPDB
>> DROP #FakeIdentiyy
>> GO
>>
>> --END PROC
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> EXEC up_stealidentity KGPLife

>
> Thanks for reminding me why I never took any SQL exams.
>
>


 
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kpg*
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-15-2007
"The Rev [MCT]" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in news:#
http://www.velocityreviews.com/forums/(E-Mail Removed):

> CREATE PROC up_stealidentity
> WITH ENCRYPTION AS
>
> --BEGIN PROC
>
> DECLARE @hIdentity varchar(20)
>
> USE TEMPDB
> GO
>
> CREATE TABLE #FakeIdentity
> (fname varchar(50),
> lname varchar,(50),
> ssid int (9),
> birthdate date)
>
> INSERT INTO #FakeIdentity
> VALUES ('Butt', 'Pirate', 123456789, '12-31-1999')
> GO
>
> USE Mankind
> GO
>
> SELECT * FROM RevLife
> INTO RevLifeBackup
> GO
>
> TRUNCATE RevLife
> GO
>
> SELECT * FROM @hIdentity
> INTO RevLife
> GO
>
> TRUNCATE @hIdentity
> GO
>
> INSERT INTO @hIdentity(fname,lname, ssid, birthdate)
> SELECT fname, lname, ssid, birthdate
> FROM #FakeIdentity
> GO
>
> USE TEMPDB
> DROP #FakeIdentiyy
> GO
>
> --END PROC
>
>
>
>
> EXEC up_stealidentity KGPLife



You passed the interview...

I'll send you a list of stored procedures I need written for my latest
project.

 
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FrisbeeŽ
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-15-2007
"kpg*" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:Xns99CA91CA28E1ipostthereforeiam@207.46.248.1 6...
> "The Rev [MCT]" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in news:#
> (E-Mail Removed):
>
>> CREATE PROC up_stealidentity
>> WITH ENCRYPTION AS
>>
>> --BEGIN PROC
>>
>> DECLARE @hIdentity varchar(20)
>>
>> USE TEMPDB
>> GO
>>
>> CREATE TABLE #FakeIdentity
>> (fname varchar(50),
>> lname varchar,(50),
>> ssid int (9),
>> birthdate date)
>>
>> INSERT INTO #FakeIdentity
>> VALUES ('Butt', 'Pirate', 123456789, '12-31-1999')
>> GO
>>
>> USE Mankind
>> GO
>>
>> SELECT * FROM RevLife
>> INTO RevLifeBackup
>> GO
>>
>> TRUNCATE RevLife
>> GO
>>
>> SELECT * FROM @hIdentity
>> INTO RevLife
>> GO
>>
>> TRUNCATE @hIdentity
>> GO
>>
>> INSERT INTO @hIdentity(fname,lname, ssid, birthdate)
>> SELECT fname, lname, ssid, birthdate
>> FROM #FakeIdentity
>> GO
>>
>> USE TEMPDB
>> DROP #FakeIdentiyy
>> GO
>>
>> --END PROC
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> EXEC up_stealidentity KGPLife

>
>
> You passed the interview...
>
> I'll send you a list of stored procedures I need written for my latest
> project.


HAW HAW YORE TEAM LOST TO KENTUCKY!

Er... cough. Maybe I should wait until after this Saturday.


 
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The Rev [MCT]
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-15-2007
You do realize I chagre like 100 bucks an hour for AdHoc work and I tend to
drink alot while doing it so it might take me a while.

--
..rev

"It is the mark of an educated man to be able to entertain a thought without
accepting it"
~Aristotle
..
"kpg*" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:Xns99CA91CA28E1ipostthereforeiam@207.46.248.1 6...
> "The Rev [MCT]" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in news:#
> (E-Mail Removed):
>
>> CREATE PROC up_stealidentity
>> WITH ENCRYPTION AS
>>
>> --BEGIN PROC
>>
>> DECLARE @hIdentity varchar(20)
>>
>> USE TEMPDB
>> GO
>>
>> CREATE TABLE #FakeIdentity
>> (fname varchar(50),
>> lname varchar,(50),
>> ssid int (9),
>> birthdate date)
>>
>> INSERT INTO #FakeIdentity
>> VALUES ('Butt', 'Pirate', 123456789, '12-31-1999')
>> GO
>>
>> USE Mankind
>> GO
>>
>> SELECT * FROM RevLife
>> INTO RevLifeBackup
>> GO
>>
>> TRUNCATE RevLife
>> GO
>>
>> SELECT * FROM @hIdentity
>> INTO RevLife
>> GO
>>
>> TRUNCATE @hIdentity
>> GO
>>
>> INSERT INTO @hIdentity(fname,lname, ssid, birthdate)
>> SELECT fname, lname, ssid, birthdate
>> FROM #FakeIdentity
>> GO
>>
>> USE TEMPDB
>> DROP #FakeIdentiyy
>> GO
>>
>> --END PROC
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> EXEC up_stealidentity KGPLife

>
>
> You passed the interview...
>
> I'll send you a list of stored procedures I need written for my latest
> project.
>


 
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kpg*
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-15-2007
> HAW HAW YORE TEAM LOST TO KENTUCKY!

At least were still in single digits.

For now.

kp" Auburn who?" g
 
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CBIC
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-15-2007

"FrisbeeŽ" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:(E-Mail Removed)...

> HAW HAW YORE TEAM LOST TO KENTUCKY!
>
> Er... cough. Maybe I should wait until after this Saturday.
>
>


Speaking of college football, during the UT vs Iowa State game I believe the
term "face r@pe" was used for the first time in prime time. I almost died
laughing.


 
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kpg*
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-15-2007
"The Rev [MCT]" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in
news:(E-Mail Removed):

> You do realize I chagre like 100 bucks an hour for AdHoc work and I
> tend to drink alot while doing it so it might take me a while.


That's OK. I write my best code when I'm sloshed. Or is that when
I'm stoned? I dunno, I forget.
 
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Thor
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-15-2007
I use reporting services, and it times out.
What am I doing wrong?
53

"The Rev [MCT]" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:%(E-Mail Removed)...
> SELECT * FROM users
> WHERE clue > 0
>
> --
> .rev
>
> "It is the mark of an educated man to be able to entertain a thought
> without
> accepting it"
> ~Aristotle
> .
> "Jtyc" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
> news:(E-Mail Removed)...
>> I'm laughing on the inside...

>


 
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