Velocity Reviews > The Zeus Compression Algorithm

# The Zeus Compression Algorithm

dunric@yahoo.com
Guest
Posts: n/a

 12-18-2005
After writing the computing urban legend "The Helsinki Code",
I spent several nights thinking up how in the world Gustav
Larsson, the Finnish PDP-8 computer programmer, could have
managed to receive such a miraculous message from God.

Surely, for a 1-byte computer program such as "@" to compile
successfully (in RTPS FORTRAN), a miracle compression algorithm
would be necessary.

Then it dawned on me. Gustav had accidentally stumbled upon
a compiled Fortran program compressed by the Impossibly Efficient
"Zeus Compression Algorithm" (ZCA). That is, a compression algo-
rithm so efficient that pages upon pages of text can be compressed
into a single byte. The ZCA, in theory, can compress the entire
contents of the Holy Bible into a single byte.

We presently know of no technology which can accomplish this, but
since God wrote the "@" program, only God could possibly make
the ZCA work. In future years, it will happen.

BTW, the story of the Helsinki Code can still be found online (just
search for it on Usenet).

A ZCA could work, in theory, like this:
(using pseudo-c)

'// ------------------------------------------------
'// zeus.c
'// An example of how a 1-byte Zeus Compression Algo
'// might be written.
'// Dec 18 2005 A.D.
'// Source code is public domain.
'// By: Paul Panks ((E-Mail Removed))
'// ------------------------------------------------
#include "compress.hhf";
#include "stdlib.hhf";
#include "strings.hhf";
#include "math.hhf";
declare string w(str 32);
declare integer null(int 32);
declare integer io.channel.read(int 32);
declare integer io.channel.write(int 32);
declare string byte1(str 32 long);
declare string byte2(str 32 long);
declare array bytelevel[100];
null:=0;
w:=null;
byte1:=memory(\$01); '\$01 is fist byte of read/write;
byte2:=memory(\$02); '\$02 is second byte of read/write;
bytelevel[100]:=[1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,
17,18,19,20,21,22,23,24,25,26,27,28,29,30,31,32,33 ,34,35,
36,37,38,39,40,41,42,43,44,45,46,47,48,49,50,51,52 ,53,54,
55,56,57,58,59,60,61,62,63,64,65,66,67,68,69,70,71 ,72,73,
74,75,76,77,78,79,80,81,82,83,84,85,86,87,88,89,90 ,91,92,
93,94,95,96,97,98,99,100];
begin program zeus;
stdout.put("Zeus Compression Algorithm [ZCA]" nl nl);
stdout.put("Input file to compress to 1 byte: ");
get.input(w);
compress(byte1,byte2) @ bytelevel[1 to 100];
call zeus; ' call special 'zeus' compression subroutine
bit.mark(byte1 as zeus);
bit.mark(byte2 as zeus);
term zeus; ' close special 'zeus' compression subroutine
writebit(byte1);
writebit(byte2);
stdout.put("File compressed to 1 byte at 100% ratio." nl);
stdout.put("To uncompress, run 'dezeus' at shell prompt." nl nl);
stdout.put("Press a key to terminate application..." nl);
get.keyinput(w);
return 0;
end program zeus;

Paul

Keith Thompson
Guest
Posts: n/a

 12-18-2005
http://www.velocityreviews.com/forums/(E-Mail Removed) writes:
> After writing the computing urban legend "The Helsinki Code",
> I spent several nights thinking up how in the world Gustav
> Larsson, the Finnish PDP-8 computer programmer, could have
> managed to receive such a miraculous message from God.

[snip]
>
> A ZCA could work, in theory, like this:
> (using pseudo-c)

[...]
> declare integer io.channel.write(int 32);
> declare string byte1(str 32 long);
> declare string byte2(str 32 long);
> declare array bytelevel[100];
> null:=0;

[snip]

I've seen some stuff about the "Helsinki Code" elsewhere, but
comp.lang.c has been relatively free of it so far.

The author seems to be under the delusion (a) that something he
recently made up out of whole cloth qualfies as an "urban legend",
(b) that the "pseudo-c" he posted bears some resemblance to actual C,
and (c) that anyone might actually be interested.

It's not C, it's off-topic, and it's almost certainly total nonsense.
For those of you who use killfiles, I suggest adding an entry. Beyond
that, please don't feed the troll.

--
Keith Thompson (The_Other_Keith) (E-Mail Removed) <http://www.ghoti.net/~kst>
San Diego Supercomputer Center <*> <http://users.sdsc.edu/~kst>
We must do something. This is something. Therefore, we must do this.

Richard Bos
Guest
Posts: n/a

 12-19-2005
Keith Thompson <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote:

> (E-Mail Removed) writes:

[ SNIP! ]
> The author seems to be under the delusion

The author is under many, many delusions. He is well known in another
group I frequent as one of the most self-delusional individuals on this
globe. He isn't even a troll - he doesn't have the grasp on reality to
understand that he's not the genius he thinks he is.

Richard

jacob navia
Guest
Posts: n/a

 12-19-2005
Richard Bos wrote:
> Keith Thompson <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote:
>
>
>>(E-Mail Removed) writes:

>
> [ SNIP! ]
>
>>The author seems to be under the delusion

>
>
> The author is under many, many delusions. He is well known in another
> group I frequent as one of the most self-delusional individuals on this
> globe. He isn't even a troll - he doesn't have the grasp on reality to
> understand that he's not the genius he thinks he is.
>
> Richard

Wait, god using C to write a program ???

Nice... What *compiler* did he use?

I would bet that he compiled with lcc-win32!!!

I'm going straight to heaven

jacob

Antonio Contreras
Guest
Posts: n/a

 12-19-2005
Keith Thompson wrote:
> (E-Mail Removed) writes:
> > After writing the computing urban legend "The Helsinki Code",
> > I spent several nights thinking up how in the world Gustav
> > Larsson, the Finnish PDP-8 computer programmer, could have
> > managed to receive such a miraculous message from God.

> [snip]
> >
> > A ZCA could work, in theory, like this:
> > (using pseudo-c)

> [...]
> > declare integer io.channel.write(int 32);
> > declare string byte1(str 32 long);
> > declare string byte2(str 32 long);
> > declare array bytelevel[100];
> > null:=0;

> [snip]
>
> I've seen some stuff about the "Helsinki Code" elsewhere, but
> comp.lang.c has been relatively free of it so far.
>
> The author seems to be under the delusion (a) that something he
> recently made up out of whole cloth qualfies as an "urban legend",
> (b) that the "pseudo-c" he posted bears some resemblance to actual C,
> and (c) that anyone might actually be interested.
>
> It's not C, it's off-topic, and it's certainly total nonsense.

Fixed the above sentence. No compression algorithm (known or unknown)
can compress *any* file to just one byte and then recover the original
file.

> For those of you who use killfiles, I suggest adding an entry. Beyond
> that, please don't feed the troll.
>
> --
> Keith Thompson (The_Other_Keith) (E-Mail Removed) <http://www.ghoti.net/~kst>
> San Diego Supercomputer Center <*> <http://users.sdsc.edu/~kst>
> We must do something. This is something. Therefore, we must do this.

Keith Thompson
Guest
Posts: n/a

 12-19-2005
"Antonio Contreras" <(E-Mail Removed)> writes:
> Keith Thompson wrote:

[snip]
>> It's not C, it's off-topic, and it's certainly total nonsense.

>
> Fixed the above sentence. No compression algorithm (known or unknown)
> can compress *any* file to just one byte and then recover the original
> file.

I wrote "it's almost certainly total nonsense". You deleted the word
"almost". You did say that you "fixed" the sentence, but please don't
alter quoted material without clearly indicating what you've changed.

I wrote "almost" because I hadn't taken the time to understand his
nonsense well enough to be certain about it. If you want to state
your own certainty, by all means do so in your own words.

(We've had people in this newsgroup deliberately alter quoted text, so
some of us are a little touchy on the subject.)

--
Keith Thompson (The_Other_Keith) (E-Mail Removed) <http://www.ghoti.net/~kst>
San Diego Supercomputer Center <*> <http://users.sdsc.edu/~kst>
We must do something. This is something. Therefore, we must do this.

Antonio Contreras
Guest
Posts: n/a

 12-19-2005
Keith Thompson wrote:
> "Antonio Contreras" <(E-Mail Removed)> writes:
> > Keith Thompson wrote:

> [snip]
> >> It's not C, it's off-topic, and it's certainly total nonsense.

> >
> > Fixed the above sentence. No compression algorithm (known or unknown)
> > can compress *any* file to just one byte and then recover the original
> > file.

>
> I wrote "it's almost certainly total nonsense". You deleted the word
> "almost". You did say that you "fixed" the sentence, but please don't
> alter quoted material without clearly indicating what you've changed.
>
> I wrote "almost" because I hadn't taken the time to understand his
> nonsense well enough to be certain about it. If you want to state
> your own certainty, by all means do so in your own words.
>
> (We've had people in this newsgroup deliberately alter quoted text, so
> some of us are a little touchy on the subject.)

I apologize if my previous post went against this group's netiquette.

What I wanted to point is that it's not necessary to read the
pseudo-code in order to be able to say that it's nonsense. The claimed
effect is simply imposible. As a friend of mine says, "entropy is the
limit between compression and magic". The zeus compression algorithm
certainly falls into the category of magic.

Alex Fraser
Guest
Posts: n/a

 12-19-2005
"Antonio Contreras" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:(E-Mail Removed) ups.com...
> Fixed the above sentence. No compression algorithm (known or unknown)
> can compress *any* file to just one byte and then recover the original
> file.

Depends on the value of CHAR_BIT .

Alex

Antonio Contreras
Guest
Posts: n/a

 12-19-2005
Alex Fraser wrote:
> "Antonio Contreras" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
> news:(E-Mail Removed) ups.com...
> > Fixed the above sentence. No compression algorithm (known or unknown)
> > can compress *any* file to just one byte and then recover the original
> > file.

>
> Depends on the value of CHAR_BIT .

xDDD

Well, in fact it doesn't. As long as CHAR_BIT remains finite such an
algorithm simply cannot exist.

Chris Dollin
Guest
Posts: n/a

 12-19-2005
Antonio Contreras wrote:

> Alex Fraser wrote:
>> "Antonio Contreras" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
>> news:(E-Mail Removed) ups.com...
>> > Fixed the above sentence. No compression algorithm (known or unknown)
>> > can compress *any* file to just one byte and then recover the original
>> > file.

>>
>> Depends on the value of CHAR_BIT .

>
> xDDD
>
> Well, in fact it doesn't. As long as CHAR_BIT remains finite such an
> algorithm simply cannot exist.

You're assuming that the universe contains unboundedly many bits.

--
Chris "bits and pieces of mind" Dollin
oxygen is a highly reactive waste-product of plant life.