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Need help getting CQPhone to work reliably.

I'm trying to use CQPhone 2.4. It works great when it works.
But it's intermittent.

I have a Westell 6100 DSL modem/router with three ports forwarded TCP + UDP.
There's a Netgear WGT624 wireless access point/switch in the loop.
I'm not using the router port on the Netgear. Windows 2K SP4.
Free Zonealarm firewall with program enabled for web access.
Turning off Zonealarm doesn't fix the problems.
Also have a SSH server and TightVNC server running

The most common symptom is no audio in one or both directions.
Video works fine when the audio is out.

Sometimes, I can call in one direction, but not the other.
Often audio works when I'm called, but not when I call out.

Seems to be a slightly different combination of symptoms
depending on who I'm calling.

I have friends with similar symptoms.

Again, video seems to work ALWAYS.
The first call after a reboot seems more likely to function properly.

Picophone works great, but I like the CQPhone features better.

My local debug setup is a XP SP2 laptop on dialup calling my desktop DSL.
I've experimented till I'm blue in the face.
Something is messed up in my configuration and I have no idea where
to look.

Ideas?
Alternatives with video and deterministic phone number. Don't have
static IP.
I tried an earlier version of eyeball chat, and didn't like it. About
to try latest version,
but I's really like to get CQPhone working reliably.

Thanks, mike