Velocity Reviews - Computer Hardware Reviews

Velocity Reviews > Newsgroups > Computing > DVD Video > BEN & JEN: More Exciting News !!!

Reply
Thread Tools

BEN & JEN: More Exciting News !!!

 
 
Scot Gardner
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-29-2003
First, we have the breaking story that _Gigli_ (pronounced Gee-Lee) will
be released on DVD December 9, 2003.

As if this Benifer news weren't exciting enough, Miramax has just
announced that _Jersey Girl_ will begin its two-week theatrical run on
March 19, 2004! After aging in the can for nearly a year, _Jersey Girl_
will be totally fermented and ready for public consumption.

Those who thought _Jersey Girl_ would be released directly to ShowTime
were wrong. Sure, _Gigli_ was a huge failure -- as was the Ben and Jen
romance. But this doesn't mean that audiences won't buy the onscreen
romance between Ben and Jen in _Jersey Girl_.

Get to the theater early, so you don't miss this theatrical window of
opportunity.

http://www.miramax.com/jersey_girl/



 
Reply With Quote
 
 
 
 
Doonie
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-29-2003
On Tue, 28 Oct 2003 21:29:25 -0800, Scot Gardner wrote:

>Get to the theater early, so you don't miss this theatrical window of
>opportunity.


And don't forget to bring a big jar of moths so that at least
SOMETHING about the movie will me memorable.

--
www.cloakanddagger.ca
 
Reply With Quote
 
 
 
 
Mark B.
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-29-2003

"Scot Gardner" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:20031029002754.881$(E-Mail Removed)...
> First, we have the breaking story that _Gigli_ (pronounced Gee-Lee) will
> be released on DVD December 9, 2003.
>
> As if this Benifer news weren't exciting enough, Miramax has just
> announced that _Jersey Girl_ will begin its two-week theatrical run on
> March 19, 2004!


Didn't you swear up & down that it would never get a theatrical run?


>After aging in the can for nearly a year, _Jersey Girl_
> will be totally fermented and ready for public consumption.
>
> Those who thought _Jersey Girl_ would be released directly to ShowTime
> were wrong.


Well at least you admit you were wrong. But do you know there's help for
obsessive behavior?

Mark


 
Reply With Quote
 
Kishin
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-29-2003
In article <20031029002754.881$(E-Mail Removed)>,
"Scot Gardner" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote:

> First, we have the breaking story that _Gigli_ (pronounced Gee-Lee) will
> be released on DVD December 9, 2003.


Damn! I was hoping it would be out in time for Thanksgiving.

Kishin
 
Reply With Quote
 
Sydney Assbasket
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-29-2003
>> First, we have the breaking story that _Gigli_ (pronounced Gee-Lee) will
>> be released on DVD December 9, 2003.

>
>Damn! I was hoping it would be out in time for Thanksgiving.


It's turkey time, gobble gobble!

Remove "moc" to reply.


Whoever says "Nothing is impossible" has never tried to slam a
revolving door.
- Willy Walker
 
Reply With Quote
 
Scot Gardner
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-30-2003
"Mark B." <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:(E-Mail Removed)...

"Scot Gardner" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:20031029002754.881$(E-Mail Removed)...
> First, we have the breaking story that _Gigli_ (pronounced Gee-Lee)
> will be released on DVD December 9, 2003.
>
> As if this Benifer news weren't exciting enough, Miramax has just
> announced that _Jersey Girl_ will begin its two-week theatrical run on
> March 19, 2004!


Didn't you swear up & down that it would never get a theatrical run?


>After aging in the can for nearly a year, _Jersey Girl_
> will be totally fermented and ready for public consumption.
>
> Those who thought _Jersey Girl_ would be released directly to ShowTime
> were wrong.


<<Well at least you admit you were wrong. But do you know there's help
for obsessive behavior? Mark>>


After noting that _Gigli_ was a huge failure -- with audiences staying
away in droves -- I mentioned that the same thing would probably happen
to _Jersey Girl_ if it were released on schedule. The dramatic failure
of _Gigli_ demonstrated that the Affleck/Lopez duet doesn't work. (Since
I wrote my original assessment, Ben and Jen have split up. The wedding's
off. See you around.)

I mentioned that Miramax had indefinitely shelved _Jersey Girl_ even
after it was scheduled for a November 2003 release. Affleck alone seems
to work and Lopez alone seems to work, but putting the two of them
together seems to add up to nothing. If this is the case -- and Miramax
seemed to agree, initially -- _Jersey Girl_ will be a flop. The only
thing that I can think of is that director Kevin Smith went back to the
cutting room and tried to salvage the second film in what was to have
been a Benifer Trilogy. It doesn't look as though the third installment
will ever materialize.

Kevin Smith's fan base may be totally-devoted and the fact that Smith
makes good movies might be good omens. However, the pre-release _Jersey
Girl_ news was not good and Miramax took notice. It's too late to
pull out Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez and substitute Hugh Grant and
Julia Roberts:

***

Aug. 5 - Looks like Ben and Jen may have turkey number two at their
door. Even while their new flick "Gigli" has been getting some of the
toughest reviews in film history, the advance buzz on their upcoming
film, "Jersey Girl," isn't much better. In fact, one person at an early
screening of the film in March says that people were walking out from
the beginning.

"THIS MOVIE is a dog! Don't see it," notes the reviewer, who admits he
was one of those who walked after an hour. "Jersey Girl" is scheduled to
open next year. "Unless the cutting room floor contains a pile over ten
feet high of unused footage, I do not think that there is any way to fix
and save this movie before its release to the general public."

http://www.msnbc.com/news/943873.asp?0cv=CB20


 
Reply With Quote
 
Wade365
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-30-2003
Thankfully, she's STILL Jenny from the block.

Dumb cow.
 
Reply With Quote
 
Scot Gardner
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      10-31-2003
"Wade365" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:(E-Mail Removed)...
> Thankfully, she's STILL Jenny from the block.
>
> Dumb cow.



And that's the reason that Miss Lopez copulates with experts. Jennifer
Lopez dates or marries men that she hopes will advance various aspects
of her career and then she quickly dumps them:

Ojani Noa: Modeling

Sean ''Puffy'' Combs: Singing

Cris Judd: Dancing

Ben Affleck: Acting

When _Cleopatra_ was being made, it was conceived as being a 6-hour,
2-movie extravaganza. However, when Liz Taylor and Dick Burton began
their adulterous relationship, Fox decided to hurriedly put together a
scaled-down, 3-hour version of _Cleopatra_ in order to take advantage of
its adulterous stars. The key factor at work here was that Cleopatra's
two married stars were fornicating and this alone was enough to sell
millions of theater tickets. If there were a delay in getting the movie
to the screen, the Liz & Dick romance might fizzle. In other words, Fox
needed to move fast while Dick Burton's new address was still the old
Fisher place on Taylor.

The same thing is true with _Jersey Girl_, but Miramax no longer has the
off-screen fornicating of Ben and Jen to attract movie goers. When
_Gigli_ was released, Ben and Jen were still engaged, still fornicating
and they had a wedding planned. In spite of all of these positive
aspects, _Gigli_ was a $50 million disaster for Sony pictures.

Now that Ben and Jen have split up, nobody gives a **** about any movie
in which they appear together. This can only mean that _Jersey Girl_
will be another major flop and that Miramax will be awash in red ink.


 
Reply With Quote
 
Rogers News
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      11-08-2003

"Scot Gardner" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:20031030220615.240$(E-Mail Removed)...
> "Wade365" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
> news:(E-Mail Removed)...
> > Thankfully, she's STILL Jenny from the block.
> >
> > Dumb cow.

>
>
> And that's the reason that Miss Lopez copulates with experts. Jennifer
> Lopez dates or marries men that she hopes will advance various aspects
> of her career and then she quickly dumps them:
>
> Ojani Noa: Modeling
>
> Sean ''Puffy'' Combs: Singing
>
> Cris Judd: Dancing
>
> Ben Affleck: Acting
>
> When _Cleopatra_ was being made, it was conceived as being a 6-hour,
> 2-movie extravaganza. However, when Liz Taylor and Dick Burton began
> their adulterous relationship, Fox decided to hurriedly put together a
> scaled-down, 3-hour version of _Cleopatra_ in order to take advantage of
> its adulterous stars. The key factor at work here was that Cleopatra's
> two married stars were fornicating and this alone was enough to sell
> millions of theater tickets. If there were a delay in getting the movie
> to the screen, the Liz & Dick romance might fizzle. In other words, Fox
> needed to move fast while Dick Burton's new address was still the old
> Fisher place on Taylor.
>
> The same thing is true with _Jersey Girl_, but Miramax no longer has the
> off-screen fornicating of Ben and Jen to attract movie goers. When
> _Gigli_ was released, Ben and Jen were still engaged, still fornicating
> and they had a wedding planned. In spite of all of these positive
> aspects, _Gigli_ was a $50 million disaster for Sony pictures.
>
> Now that Ben and Jen have split up, nobody gives a **** about any movie
> in which they appear together. This can only mean that _Jersey Girl_
> will be another major flop and that Miramax will be awash in red ink.
>
>

Jen has ass warts and clemidia


 
Reply With Quote
 
Scot Gardner
Guest
Posts: n/a
 
      11-08-2003
"Rogers News" <(E-Mail Removed)> wrote in message
news:Zs_qb.179622$(E-Mail Removed) able.rogers.com...

> Jen has ass warts and chlamydia.


Did her gynecologist kiss and tell?



 
Reply With Quote
 
 
 
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Pyjamas - Why is this concept of Desktop + ClientSide App not more exciting? thunk Ruby 1 01-29-2011 01:42 AM
Get your own News Server , have more 60000 news groups , no binairies only text , second edition floffy Computer Support 0 09-20-2009 02:15 PM
Breaking News: First Look at Aperture 1.5 - By Ben Long Frank ess Digital Photography 3 09-26-2006 05:06 PM
False News More Damaging Than No News At All mistressredjade@gmail.com Digital Photography 0 03-10-2006 11:54 PM



Advertisments