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need an opinion.

Yesterday, I was outside working and when I opened the back door, there
were, to my surprise, four people sitting at our dining room table. My
wife, a friend of ours, and two friends of hers.

I was really upset because I had asked this person to please call prior to
coming, especially if she were bringing "strangers". Note that this is not
the first time she has done this.

I was filthy dirty, shirtless, and quite embarrassed. On my way back
outside, I left a note on our guests car that read "if you can't call before
you come, especially with strangers, don't come"

Now the problem is that my wife is mad at me. She said the note was "nasty"
and that friends don't need an invitation.

I agree partially with this. I could live with our friend "dropping in",
but quite often after work, I can be found running around the house in my
underwear, and I think that if she were going to bring "strangers", she
should call. I would even settle for an attempt to call as she could leave
a message and we have Caller ID on the telephone. Our friend also has a
total of three different phone numbers for us.

Please post your opinion, should this lady call or am I out of line?

Thanks,
Glenn

Your point is a valid point -- it's your house, and you
should be able to expect, no demand, your privacy.
However, your sneaky use of the note on the car
was underhand, and your wife also has a right to
be angry -- a direct, but polite, approach would
have been better. Explain the situation to all parties,
and if they are true friends, they will understand.
If you go about it the wrong way, you WILL estrange
both your wife and your friends. It's all about
communication; sit down and talk.


On Sun, 07 Mar 2004 18:15:15 GMT, in
<TEJ2c.78834$ko6.418908@attbi_s02>
Glenan scrawled:

> need an opinion.
>
>Yesterday, I was outside working and when I opened the back door, there
>were, to my surprise, four people sitting at our dining room table. My
>wife, a friend of ours, and two friends of hers.
>
>I was really upset because I had asked this person to please call prior to
>coming, especially if she were bringing "strangers". Note that this is not
>the first time she has done this.
>
>I was filthy dirty, shirtless, and quite embarrassed. On my way back
>outside, I left a note on our guests car that read "if you can't call before
>you come, especially with strangers, don't come"
>
>Now the problem is that my wife is mad at me. She said the note was "nasty"
>and that friends don't need an invitation.
>
>I agree partially with this. I could live with our friend "dropping in",
>but quite often after work, I can be found running around the house in my
>underwear, and I think that if she were going to bring "strangers", she
>should call. I would even settle for an attempt to call as she could leave
>a message and we have Caller ID on the telephone. Our friend also has a
>total of three different phone numbers for us.
>
>Please post your opinion, should this lady call or am I out of line?
>
>Thanks,
>Glenn
>

--
Basic computer maintenance
http://uk.geocities.com/personel44/maintenance.html

"Glenan" <> wrote in message
news:TEJ2c.78834$ko6.418908@attbi_s02...
> need an opinion.
>
> Yesterday, I was outside working and when I opened the back door, there
> were, to my surprise, four people sitting at our dining room table. My
> wife, a friend of ours, and two friends of hers.
>
> I was really upset because I had asked this person to please call prior to
> coming, especially if she were bringing "strangers". Note that this is
not
> the first time she has done this.
>
> I was filthy dirty, shirtless, and quite embarrassed. On my way back
> outside, I left a note on our guests car that read "if you can't call
before
> you come, especially with strangers, don't come"
>
> Now the problem is that my wife is mad at me. She said the note was
"nasty"
> and that friends don't need an invitation.
>

<snip>

Although I suppose you are technically right...
I do think you over-reacted. I guess if someone dropped over unannounced
and saw you running around in your underware...
if it bothered them...they'd probably have enough sense to *not* do that
again...

If you did have a gripe...you should have just said to the person:"
"Hey! Please give me a warning first!"
Rather than leaving a note.

I think the problem is with your wife. She must know how you feel about it
and she could have called you or gave you some kind a warring that you have
company. That way you can use a back door, get cleaned up, and then greet
them properly. Leaving the note was kind of nasty and embarrassing to your
wife and you should apologize. Her friend is a lost cause but maybe with
that note she will catch on.

--


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"Glenan" <> wrote in message
news:TEJ2c.78834$ko6.418908@attbi_s02...
> need an opinion.
>
> Yesterday, I was outside working and when I opened the back door, there
> were, to my surprise, four people sitting at our dining room table. My
> wife, a friend of ours, and two friends of hers.
>
> I was really upset because I had asked this person to please call prior to
> coming, especially if she were bringing "strangers". Note that this is
not
> the first time she has done this.
>
> I was filthy dirty, shirtless, and quite embarrassed. On my way back
> outside, I left a note on our guests car that read "if you can't call
before
> you come, especially with strangers, don't come"
>
> Now the problem is that my wife is mad at me. She said the note was
"nasty"
> and that friends don't need an invitation.
>
> I agree partially with this. I could live with our friend "dropping in",
> but quite often after work, I can be found running around the house in my
> underwear, and I think that if she were going to bring "strangers", she
> should call. I would even settle for an attempt to call as she could
leave
> a message and we have Caller ID on the telephone. Our friend also has a
> total of three different phone numbers for us.
>
> Please post your opinion, should this lady call or am I out of line?
>
> Thanks,
> Glenn
>
>