[waaay OT] second try
 

MS modded the first one. See if a couple of changes let this one get thru;


Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to
people who call in to her radio show. Recently she said that
homosexuality is an abomination according to Lev*****us 18:22,
and cannot be condoned under any circumstances. The
following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a US resident, which
was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative.

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have
learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with
as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual
lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Le*****us 18:22 clearly
states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other
specific laws and how to follow them.

1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
pleasing odor for the Lord -- Le*. 1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They
claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exo***
21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for
her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
period of menstrual uncleanliness -- Le*. 15:19-24. The problem is, how do
I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

4. Le*. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and
female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of
mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exo*** 35:2
clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill
him myself?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
abomination -- Le*. 11:10-- it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality.
I don't agree. Can you settle this?

7. Le*. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a
defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my
vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Le*.
19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Le*. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me
unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Le*. 19:19 by planting two different
crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two
different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse
and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble
of getting the whole town together to stone them? -- Le*.24:10-16.
Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do
with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Le*. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you
can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and
unchanging.

Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.

Re: [waaay OT] second try
 

> MS modded the first one. See if a couple of changes let this one get thru;
>

Hmmm. I can see the first one. Maybe your computer isn't a Christian
Fundamentalist.

--

KB - MCNGP "silent thug" #26

first initial last name AT hotmail DOT com

Re: [waaay OT] second try
 

the other one got thru for me... :P

--
Sue MCNGP #69

"JaR" <plentenospam@nospamsofthome.net> wrote in message
news:e9QuRmJAEHA.1212@TK2MSFTNGP12.phx.gbl...
> MS modded the first one. See if a couple of changes let this one get thru;
>
>
> Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to
> people who call in to her radio show. Recently she said that
> homosexuality is an abomination according to Lev*****us 18:22,
> and cannot be condoned under any circumstances. The
> following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a US resident, which
> was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative.
>
> Dear Dr. Laura:
>
> Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have
> learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with
> as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual
> lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Le*****us 18:22 clearly
> states it to be an abomination. End of debate.
>
> I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other
> specific laws and how to follow them.
>
> 1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
> pleasing odor for the Lord -- Le*. 1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They
> claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
>
> 2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exo***
> 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for
> her?
>
> 3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
> period of menstrual uncleanliness -- Le*. 15:19-24. The problem is, how do
> I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.
>
> 4. Le*. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and
> female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of
> mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
> clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
>
> 5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exo*** 35:2
> clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill
> him myself?
>
> 6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
> abomination -- Le*. 11:10-- it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality.
> I don't agree. Can you settle this?
>
> 7. Le*. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a
> defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my
> vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
>
> 8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
> around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Le*.
> 19:27. How should they die?
>
> 9. I know from Le*. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me
> unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
>
> 10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Le*. 19:19 by planting two different
> crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two
> different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse
> and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble
> of getting the whole town together to stone them? -- Le*.24:10-16.
> Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do
> with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Le*. 20:14)
>
> I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you
> can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and
> unchanging.
>
> Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.

Re: [waaay OT] second try
 

> MS modded the first one. See if a couple of changes let this one get thru;

I didn't know you were Jewish.

Re: [waaay OT] second try
 

>
> I didn't know you were Jewish.

Deja vu. Creepy.

--

KB - MCNGP "silent thug" #26

first initial last name AT hotmail DOT com

Re: [waaay OT] second try
 

> Deja vu. Creepy.

I felt obligated.

Re: [waaay OT] second try
 

Ken Briscoe opined, On 3/2/04 1:07 PM:

>>MS modded the first one. See if a couple of changes let this one get thru;
>>
>
>
> Hmmm. I can see the first one. Maybe your computer isn't a Christian
> Fundamentalist.
>

Interesting!

I can see the second one, but not the first! I even checked both servers
msnews.microsoft.com & news.microsoft.com.

JaR
Bemused Thug

Re: [waaay OT] second try
 

Cause u r 2 quik of a Brat! :-)


"Brat" <likeIwouldtellyou@inyourdreams.com> wrote in message
news:e61gppJAEHA.220@TK2MSFTNGP09.phx.gbl...
> the other one got thru for me... :P
>
> --
> Sue MCNGP #69
>
> "JaR" <plentenospam@nospamsofthome.net> wrote in message
> news:e9QuRmJAEHA.1212@TK2MSFTNGP12.phx.gbl...
> > MS modded the first one. See if a couple of changes let this one get
thru;
> >
> >
> > Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to
> > people who call in to her radio show. Recently she said that
> > homosexuality is an abomination according to Lev*****us 18:22,
> > and cannot be condoned under any circumstances. The
> > following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a US resident, which
> > was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative.
> >
> > Dear Dr. Laura:
> >
> > Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I
have
> > learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge
with
> > as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual
> > lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Le*****us 18:22
clearly
> > states it to be an abomination. End of debate.
> >
> > I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other
> > specific laws and how to follow them.
> >
> > 1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
> > pleasing odor for the Lord -- Le*. 1:9. The problem is my neighbors.
They
> > claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
> >
> > 2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in
Exo***
> > 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for
> > her?
> >
> > 3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
> > period of menstrual uncleanliness -- Le*. 15:19-24. The problem is, how
do
> > I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.
> >
> > 4. Le*. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and
> > female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend
of
> > mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
> > clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
> >
> > 5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exo*** 35:2
> > clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill
> > him myself?
> >
> > 6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
> > abomination -- Le*. 11:10-- it is a lesser abomination than
homosexuality.
> > I don't agree. Can you settle this?
> >
> > 7. Le*. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have
a
> > defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my
> > vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
> >
> > 8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
> > around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Le*.
> > 19:27. How should they die?
> >
> > 9. I know from Le*. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me
> > unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
> >
> > 10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Le*. 19:19 by planting two
different
> > crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of
two
> > different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to
curse
> > and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the
trouble
> > of getting the whole town together to stone them? -- Le*.24:10-16.
> > Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we
do
> > with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Le*. 20:14)
> >
> > I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you
> > can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal
and
> > unchanging.
> >
> > Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.
>
>

Re: [waaay OT] second try
 

Saw the second, not the first.....

But as a gay friend of mine always says.... "I'll take the sausage out of
my mouth, when you take the sausage out of yours"

"JaR" <plentenospam@nospamsofthome.net> wrote in message
news:e9QuRmJAEHA.1212@TK2MSFTNGP12.phx.gbl...
> MS modded the first one. See if a couple of changes let this one get thru;
>
>
> Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to
> people who call in to her radio show. Recently she said that
> homosexuality is an abomination according to Lev*****us 18:22,
> and cannot be condoned under any circumstances. The
> following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a US resident, which
> was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative.
>
> Dear Dr. Laura:
>
> Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have
> learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with
> as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual
> lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Le*****us 18:22 clearly
> states it to be an abomination. End of debate.
>
> I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other
> specific laws and how to follow them.
>
> 1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
> pleasing odor for the Lord -- Le*. 1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They
> claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
>
> 2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exo***
> 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for
> her?
>
> 3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
> period of menstrual uncleanliness -- Le*. 15:19-24. The problem is, how do
> I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.
>
> 4. Le*. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and
> female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of
> mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
> clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
>
> 5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exo*** 35:2
> clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill
> him myself?
>
> 6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
> abomination -- Le*. 11:10-- it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality.
> I don't agree. Can you settle this?
>
> 7. Le*. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a
> defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my
> vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
>
> 8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
> around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Le*.
> 19:27. How should they die?
>
> 9. I know from Le*. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me
> unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
>
> 10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Le*. 19:19 by planting two different
> crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two
> different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse
> and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble
> of getting the whole town together to stone them? -- Le*.24:10-16.
> Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do
> with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Le*. 20:14)
>
> I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you
> can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and
> unchanging.
>
> Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.

Re: [waaay OT] second try
 

you know what, punch him in the jaw


"Kendal Emery" <kemery@coordinatedhomecare.me.com> wrote in message
news:%23WP62JKAEHA.2348@TK2MSFTNGP09.phx.gbl...
> Saw the second, not the first.....
>
> But as a gay friend of mine always says.... "I'll take the sausage out of
> my mouth, when you take the sausage out of yours"
>
> "JaR" <plentenospam@nospamsofthome.net> wrote in message
> news:e9QuRmJAEHA.1212@TK2MSFTNGP12.phx.gbl...
> > MS modded the first one. See if a couple of changes let this one get
thru;
> >
> >
> > Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to
> > people who call in to her radio show. Recently she said that
> > homosexuality is an abomination according to Lev*****us 18:22,
> > and cannot be condoned under any circumstances. The
> > following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a US resident, which
> > was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative.
> >
> > Dear Dr. Laura:
> >
> > Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I
have
> > learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge
with
> > as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual
> > lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Le*****us 18:22
clearly
> > states it to be an abomination. End of debate.
> >
> > I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other
> > specific laws and how to follow them.
> >
> > 1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a
> > pleasing odor for the Lord -- Le*. 1:9. The problem is my neighbors.
They
> > claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
> >
> > 2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in
Exo***
> > 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for
> > her?
> >
> > 3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
> > period of menstrual uncleanliness -- Le*. 15:19-24. The problem is, how
do
> > I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.
> >
> > 4. Le*. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and
> > female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend
of
> > mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
> > clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
> >
> > 5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exo*** 35:2
> > clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill
> > him myself?
> >
> > 6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
> > abomination -- Le*. 11:10-- it is a lesser abomination than
homosexuality.
> > I don't agree. Can you settle this?
> >
> > 7. Le*. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have
a
> > defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my
> > vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
> >
> > 8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
> > around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Le*.
> > 19:27. How should they die?
> >
> > 9. I know from Le*. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me
> > unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
> >
> > 10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Le*. 19:19 by planting two
different
> > crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of
two
> > different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to
curse
> > and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the
trouble
> > of getting the whole town together to stone them? -- Le*.24:10-16.
> > Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we
do
> > with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Le*. 20:14)
> >
> > I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you
> > can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal
and
> > unchanging.
> >
> > Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.
>
>