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Del's "except"ional PEP Rejection
Del's "except"ional PEP Rejection
Ladieees and Gentilmen and Pyth-O-neers of all ages. Step right up. Don't be shy. Come one come all. Be the first on your block TO GROK *THE* one *THE* only Exception you won't find any where but here! The Exception that's Exceptional! It's the "elif from lamdba except" Exception. (The only Exception that don't need an "except" clause, Because it *IS* one.) It's the story of Del, an intermitantly deaf, intermitantly nauseated importation executive with Print Global Inc. Del's a company man, and the 150 year old, family owned company needs someone to lead them all into the 21'st Century. Having over heard... ( It's amazing how some people who seem deaf at times can hear things from what was supposed to be a closed door meeting between ) ....the VP of Statis talking down to the 85 year old Chief of Data Processing ... ( History Note--that's what they used to call them you know -- worked his way up from crank turner -- but I digress ) .... what was I saying oh yeah Del over heard the VP telling the old guy, "Hell, my 12 year kid stuck *some* kinda snake, wait it was a python, yeah he stuck a python in an old Apple II that was in the attic a week ago Sunday and started typeing like mad and by Thursday he was telling me that he had gone GLOBAL and wouldn't need his allowance anymore. No it's time to upgrade. Shut down the ENIAC." Cut to the "ever butt kissing" Del, half deaf, sitting in Python school. Well, sorta sitting 'cuz' Del's got bowel problems and he needs another pass from the Instructor to go to the lav. Sitting on the pot, like a splash, a thought hits him. ( gosh I hope it was just a thought ) Ya see, Dan didn't just volenteer for this mission, he was holding back from the company. He new a litte "c" code. Just enough to be dangerous, and it made him sick to his stomach. But this Python Language! He truely understood and liked what he was learing. Python was indented so you could read it like a self respecting human being. It was impressive to him, the way you could write your code in the interpreter, and did't have to declare anything or agonize while you waited to see if it worked. He liked the way "elif" statements made case switches easier to code and understand. How "from" this "import" that made code re-usable. How "lamda" could define a function in a function without having to define a function for a function. How exceptions could be used to make programs that worked the first time. He loved the "while loops" and the list comprehensions that had little "for loops" and "if"s in them. He like how any one on the planet, with enough money to maintain a computer and an internet connection, could just be so very proud that they had their PEP rejected by the most intelligent, helpful, thoughtful, and kindest people on Earth. Sitting right there on the throne of inspiration he came up with the only exception that uses all the keywords, types all in one color in the editor, and makes sense to only him, so he sent in a PEP to be rejected... wait for it wait for it Bam! The elif from lambda except: statment elif from lambda except: while del is not def: [import exec for print global] try: and continue or else: return break pass in class finally: yeild if assert *PYTHON* *THE*WAY *GUIDO* *INDENTED* *IT*TO*BE* By Raymond St. Marie (Rastm2@aol.com -- don't laugh, it's been free since I lost my job in January) |
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